Inspiring Excellence

Inspiring Excellence Has Moved ...

2011-05-09T07:05:00.002-06:00

You can now find Inspiring Excellence at inspiredbysarah.com ...

A preview of what you will find there ...
"I am so very excited to launch this wonderful new blog! God has always pressed upon my heart the desire to reach out and encourage others in their faith. I believe that this new adventure is one of the unique avenues in which He is enabling me to do so. My hope is that this blog inspires and encourages you in your daily walk. Enjoy devotionals, fun marriage & family focused posts and creative crafting and cooking projects. I am blessed to be joined by two amazing Christian women as regular contributors who I think you will really enjoy following!"

Visit me there today and from now on!

-Sarah

Tis A Season Of Change For Inspiring Excellence

2011-05-02T10:44:00.001-06:00

Over the last few years I really struggled to find my purpose ... my own special thing that I could use in this world that was especially mine. A way to reach others and make a difference. I prayed and sought and prayed some more. I knew that God had something amazing planned but I wasn't seeing where or when that plan would ever come forth and bear fruit in my life.

Suddenly He began to rekindle a passion of mine ... writing and words. I faithfully started blogging unaware if anyone other then my loyal Mother was reading. Then out of the blue, after a couple of years of nothing, He began throwing opportunities in my path left and right. He blessed me with wonderful opportunities to expose my writing to an entire new world of readers. He brought the most unexpected, random people into my life to encourage me and give me the tools I needed to push my dreams even further then I could have ever imagined. He also brought old friends back into my life who have had incredible weight in pushing me ahead. It's been unreal!

So, I am taking a leap of faith ... it might be too early, it might just be perfect timing ... regardless I am taking off! I have a top secret project (tease!) that I am working on with one of those unexpected people that God brought back into my life ... a project that I am very excited about and will hopefully be able to share sometime in the fall or winter. I am also very pleased to announce the coming of a new multi-faceted website for Christian women. My hope is that this new blog/website inspires and encourages you all in your daily walk. You will be able to enjoy devotionals, fun marriage & family focused posts and creative crafting and cooking projects. I am exceptionally blessed to be joined by two amazing Christian woman as regular contributors who I think you will really enjoy following and getting to know!

So get ready ... Monday May 9 (next week!) my new venture will launch!!! It will be a very fun week full of creative giveaways, introductions to my new fabulous contributors and more of your favorite inspirational devotionals. Look for the new web address Monday morning and please stop by to check us out and tell us what you think. *Inspiring Excellence on blogspot will no longer be in use after next Monday*

I am so blessed by the opportunities that God has given me and feel that this new chapter will be a great one! I hope that you will follow me in this exciting move ... I think you will pleased with what you find!!!

~Also, check me out at FancyLittleThings.com every Thursday this May under their Faith section. Another wonderful blessing for me to take part in.

Take A Look At This Beautiful Give Away I Am Entering!

2011-04-26T10:45:00.000-06:00

Visit FancyLittleThings.com today for a chance to win a spring-tastic give-away! Follow this link ... Fancy Little Things

Blessings to you!

Challenge Part V: The Ultimate Challenge (at least for me!)

2011-04-26T08:00:00.004-06:00

Grant Cochrane

"Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do,” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, “I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!"

Malachi 3:10

As I sat here today paying bills, getting frustrated because there wasn't quite enough this pay period to cover what needed to be covered I found myself wishing there was more. I wished that things could be easier and that finances wouldn't be such a struggle. Then I felt that old familiar tug reminding me of what He has been prompting me to do for the last couple of months- up my giving! But how on earth can I up my giving when I am already short?!

Let's back it up a bit ... In Malachi God commands us to tithe, or bring our first ten percent, to Him ... Now, I want to know who of you readers gives a full ten percent? Seriously, if you do it I want to hear from you! Last year I was convicted to challenge our family to tithe every month for the year and so we did it. We did not do a full ten percent because that seemed really scary but we did what we could in order to still be able to pay our other bills. God did AMAZING things in our life financially. He really came through for us in times of desperate need and every bill that we had last year was paid.

However, this year He has really put it on my heart to bring forth our entire first ten percent... yikes! When you look at it as He gets $1 and we get to keep $9, it seems easy. Giving Him $10 and we keep $90, thats cool. But when you get into bigger numbers and start to look over all your monthly bills, family needs, etc. it can appear more and more daunting. So back to my present situation ... I find myself facing this scary request by God to up what I am already doing ... He is pushing me to do the full ten percent ... [deep breath].

Why do we have to even tithe? What do we actually get out of it? If we don't give our ten percent tithe are we cursed? Well, we aren't cursed but we don't get that extra blessing that He promises in Malachi 3:10. When we honor Him by giving Him our first fruits we are allowing Him to take control of our lives. When we give, God has the final word over all we have- all is blessed when His hand is on it. When we do what He asks we experience the ultimate abundence of life through Him. If the root is healthy so are the braches. I don't know about you but I want His blessings over everything in my life! Ultimate abundance in my life sounds pretty appealing right now!

How many of you are scared about giving financially? Do you give little bits here and there or do you give until it hurts? I know that I do not give until it hurts. I'm scared! I am talking myself into this challenge as I type. We (I) need to step out in faith and not let our (my) human mind talk us out of things He has called us (me) to do. It is all about obedience. When He presents you with a "you want me to do what?!" moment, embrace it! We might not be able to see how it is all going work out but our God is not one who sets us up for failure. With God ANYTHING is possible!

Challenge: So! I challenge you with what I am challenging myself to do ... give. Give your entire first ten percent and see what happens. Let's start by setting a three month time period. Malachi 3:10 is the ONLY place in the Bible where God tells us to test Him ... so test Him. Let's step out in faith together and see what happens in our lives when we let go of our control and let Him take over our finances! It will be scary but I know He won't leave a single one of us out in the rain. I am SO anxious to hear how this challenge plays out in your life- and if you already give that first ten percent and want to share how God has blessed you through that, please share your story with me! Stay in touch over the next three months and after that time let's discuss together what we have experienced through this time.

Prayer: LORD, I want to be obedient to you in all areas of my life. I want to embrace your challenges rather than hide from them. I know you have my best interest at heart and that you want to see me living abundantly through you. Please give me the strength to answer this call. Please convinct me when I get scared and start to back away. LORD, I pray that you multiply my tithe so that it may reach many for your greater good . Protect me, my family, our finances and guide us daily so that we make choices that honor you. Thank you for the many blessings that you have bestowed upon me. Amen.

Challenge Part IV- Journal It!

2011-04-21T08:30:00.001-06:00

nuttakit

Journaling ... this is not detailed or deep but rather a simple way to open yourself up to Him ... Journal. Journal everyday. What is the point? Why do I need a diary? Well, it isn't necessarily a diary. It is simply a place to write anything that you want. I encourage you to write a little something each day in a notebook, on the computer, however you prefer but get words out everyday. I have been surprised at how much I can hear from God as my thoughts tumble onto paper. He has various ways of speaking to us and through our own thoughts and words is one of those ways. Sitting down in quiet to write is a great compliment to the quiet time you are already striving toward.

I was recently surprised to hear that a close friend of ours had began writing. The person who we would have least expected to write is regularly writing their thoughts and feelings down in an amazing and beautiful way. They admitted that writing was healing and a way to move past prior hurt and pain. Writing can be so freeing! Getting thoughts, frustrations and ideas out on paper really helps to calm and relax. Sometimes venting on paper releases feelings that otherwise would bog you down. Rather then lashing out at people you get it all out in a healthier way.

Writing is refreshing and can inspire you further. I have gone back various times and looked at things I have written in the past and found new inspirations and ideas that I had forgotten about. Bottom line, journaling is good for the soul and might just help you in your relationship with Christ!

Challenge: I challenge you to write in a journal of some sort everyday for a week. You don't need to write pages upon pages (unless you get started and just can't stop!), but even just a short paragraph would do you good. Write anything from your pain, your joy, your inspirations, your ideas, your fears, your hopes and dreams ... just write! Pray before you write that God would inspire you and speak to you through your own writing.

How Are You Doing?

2011-04-20T15:10:00.001-06:00

Have you taken any of my challenges? If so how are they going? Have you attempted giving more time to Christ? Have you taken the pride challenge? What about forgiveness? It's hard but I truly believe that by taking small steps such as these we will start to experience Christ in a more intimate way ... If we are faithful to Him in all we do and if we strive to move past our strongholds so that we can honor Him, incredible changes will start taking place in our lives!

It has been a challenge for me to wake up early, and if I am being totally honest, a couple times I didn't make it up early. Mmost days I did great, but a few I stumbled. The great thing is that last week when I woke up early and had that early morning alone time I was blessed with days filled with Him. Did I still face the challenges of everyday? Yes. Was I better equipped to handle what was thrown at me? Absolutely! I am not just saying that, I truly noticed small differences in my day as He led me instead of me trying to micro-manage and get through on my own! Throughout my day I would find little things happening in my favor and couldn't help but to smile and thank Him. I will go at it again tomorrow morning!

The pride challenge is definitely the hardest for me ... I am one of those that always wants to bring up my own experiences when someone is trying to tell me about themselves. Controlling myself and ensuring that I just listen without bringing "me" into a conversation is hard, but wow have I noticed a change in my relationships when I do that. It really is a good exercise and helps to make us more aware of putting others first. Pride is awful but learning to overcome it in small steps makes the process less daunting!

How have you been challenged? Have you taken these challenges or changed them to tailor fit you? I would love to hear about what God is doing in your life as you surrender yourself and pursue intimacy with Him!

Featuring Sweet C's Designs & A Fun Give Away!

2011-04-18T08:18:00.000-06:00

Good Monday morning to you all! This week I am very excited to feature a good friend of mine who has been a true inspiration and encouragement to me as I have journeyed through the world of blogging ... Courtney at Sweet C's Designs! Courtney is a master at unique projects and designs and I highly recommend you check her out today!

Courtney has graciously contributed an adorable Easter tote for a give away this morning. To enter the drawing for her Easter tote please leave me a comment on Inspiring Excellence's facebook page about something that inspires you AND "like" Sweet C's Designs facebook page and leave her a comment about your favorite project on her blog. The winner will be announced Tuesday morning at 10 a.m. mountain time ... Happy reading everyone!

After leaving a hectic and high profile career in politics, Courtney is now a recent stay at home mom to an adorable, independent and super-curious little boy and a rambunctious black lab.

She loves to create using her trusty sewing machine and cricut, and find simple ways to brighten up homemade gifts, decorate parties, and entertain friends. She is still involved in a lot of political events in her spare time, and consults for a few people on the side- but her new job as "mom" is the most rewarding thing she could ever do. She enjoys being able to take the time to share fun and inspiring projects with other moms and women like herself.

Courtney also loves taking pictures, and has recently become a photoshop fanatic. She has been working on a series of tutorials for newbies to DSLR photography to debut soon.

Courtney's work can be found at her newly created Etsy shop at: http://www.etsy.com/shop/sweetcs, on her blog at : http://www.sweetcsdesigns.blogspot.com/, or on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/sweetcsdesigns.

Challenge Part III- Forgiveness ... Special Guest Jessica Giadrosich

2011-04-17T09:00:00.001-06:00

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people who are holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And above all these things, put on love which binds them all together in perfect unity.”

Colossians 3:12-14

Since I became a Christian, I have always really struggled with forgiveness. I know that God commands me to forgive other people who offend or sin against me, just as He forgives me for sinning against him. And I want to do so! I want to pass on this amazing grace and undeserved mercy that I’ve received from him to others. I don’t want to live my daily life in a prison of unforgiveness separated from God and isolated from people. I don’t particularly like the taste of bitterness that resentment causes to manifest over time in my heart. I’d rather experience the freedom that forgiveness produces in my life, even if that person who hurt me isn’t aware, doesn’t care or doesn’t apologize for what they did. I’d prefer to avoid the trap of anger and misery that the enemy hopes I’ll fall into by harboring unforgiveness in my heart. He wants to keep me from living in peace with God, with others and with myself. He wants to prevent me from staying connected to God because he knows it affects how I see myself and treat others. If anything, forgiveness is an attack on the enemy’s scheme to keep me from showing God’s love to others, which could have an eternal impact on their life.

What a waste of my own life to dwell on the sin of someone else! Especially if they’re going about their life without any knowledge or concern of their offense. It’s as though I’m surprised when someone disappoints or hurts me. I forget that all people are sinners and fall short of God’s glorious standard. I forget that he alone is perfect, hence I, too fall into the category of those who hurt and offend others. But my sinful, selfish nature tends to cry out, “It’s just too hard to forgive, God!”

There are times when it’s easier for me to have compassion and mercy towards someone who’s hurt me. I’ve realized that it tends to correlate with the closeness of my relationship with God and my understanding of how great his forgiveness and unconditional love is for me (feeling that I am holy and dearly loved as the scripture says). When I’m able to grasp this, even just briefly, in my mind and feel the gravity of it in my heart, then I’m able to view other people in this light as well.

Other times, my flesh rears its ugly head and I don’t want to forgive! This tends to reflect my lack of closeness to God. I’m too upset to let the offense go because I was needing something from or expecting something of another person and they didn’t come through for me. It’s usually later after I’ve reacted in an unloving way that I realize it was normal for them to fail me, and that God is the only one who can and always will come through for me. It’s especially difficult to forgive though when the person involved is close to me and I thought I could count on them such as my parents or my husband. It seems to hurt worse when someone you love lets you down and causes you pain- whether it was intentional or accidental.

I tend to hold unrealistic, impossible expectations of others to treat me fairly and kindly at all times. My flesh wants to dwell on the situation, replaying the actions or words spoken over and over until the damage done is exaggerated and a bigger deal than it should be. I pick at the wound, making it deeper and larger, instead of running to God immediately for a band-aid so that I can keep playing and go about my day. The glorious thing about God that sets him apart from all others is that he is perfect, incapable of letting us down or hurting us! I subconsciously think that by not pardoning that person’s error and “punishing” them for their sin, I will feel better, they will act better in the future, and justice will be served. But based on God’s word, I know that that’s wrong of me. I’m not the one to judge and I have no right to harbor unforgiveness towards anyone for any reason. Even if a person is continuously sinning against me or they are regularly committing the same sin that affects my life on a daily basis, I’m called to follow Christ’s example and forgive them every single time (Matthew 18:21-22).

It’s an area of constant struggle for me- almost a daily battle since every day there are opportunities and situations that arise when I have to decide whether or not to take offense or let it go. As Joyce Meyer says, let go and let God! Let Him deal with them and be the one who judges. (See 2 Thessalonians 1:6, Ecclesiastes 3:17 and 12:14)

1 Peter 2:23 tells us that “When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate. When he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to Him who judges justly.” How often do we want to retaliate right after we’ve been wronged? My initial instinct is to want to punish that person with harsh words, slander, loss of relationship, or the good-old cold shoulder and silent treatment. I no longer have a desire to love, serve or help them anymore because they don’t “deserve” it. How wrong of me! I don’t deserve the treatment I receive from God. He calls us to love one another and forgive each other for our sins as he does to us. I know I would want someone to do the same if I sinned against them. If I allow the Spirit to rule over me instead, maybe I would remember right after suffering an offense that God sees everything. He saw what happened outwardly and what was the condition of that person’s heart inwardly. He sees my hurt and the consequences I endure because of their actions. Also, He alone is the ultimate judge of all persons (including myself, which motivates me to do what’s right before him) and he will see to it that justice is served in due time.

I can’t control what other people choose to do, but I can control how I react to them. I hope that with each opportunity I face I will react better by handing the situation to God immediately and receive healing so that I can forgive that person. Who knows, that forgiveness, which reflects the character of God, could lead that person to understanding and embracing His forgiveness!

I know this calling to love and forgive other people as God does seems overwhelming and, quite honestly, impossible. I think it’s okay and normal for us to feel incapable of fulfilling this high standard. There’s no way we can accomplish it on our own. As humans, we care too much about fairness and it’s hard not to let our emotions control our actions. But what is impossible with man is possible with God. Do what you can and let God do the rest. Choose to obey him and forgive the other person, then let him heal your wounds and that person’s heart, too. Let’s work with God (or rather, let His Spirit work in us) to show loving kindness and mercy towards others who need to feel his presence as much or even more than we do! Let’s follow Christ’s example on the cross and walk out the unconditional love and endless forgiveness of God that doesn’t keep a record of wrongs and whose mercy is new every morning (we especially need this in our marriages). If anything, we’ll know that we’re in right standing with God (Luke 6:37) and we’ll grow closer to Him as he replaces our weakness with his strength and heals our broken hearts (Isaiah 61:1 The Spirit of the sovereign Lord is on me because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners).

Verses for further reading on forgiveness:
Mark 11:25, Proverbs 19:11, Matthew 6:14, Romans 15:7, Ephesians 4:2-3 4:31-32

By Jessica Giadrosich
http://www.aletterfromchrist.blogspot.com/ Blog
http://www.dailybreadandlivingwater.blogspot.com/ Devotions

Thank you so much Jessica for sharing your heart ... What beautiful and inspiring words!!!

Challenge: A couple years ago my family went through some very difficult times and there was someone who I struggled very much with to forgive for various hurtful things. I wasn't innocent and contributed in part to the hurt. After harboring harsh feelings, anger and resentment in my heart for a long time I felt God pulling me to forgive her and also apologize to her for my part. It was one of those "you want me to do what God?!" moments in life. She had hurt me and my family too and I didn't expect to ever hear an apology from her so why should I? God pushed me again saying that it didn't matter if she apologized or not, I needed to do my part to apologize and forgive her in my heart. I followed His lead and sent a card sincerely apologizing for my part in our situation. I asked for forgiveness and in my heart forgave her as well. It was such a freeing feeling! I was surprised at how good I felt. She ended up thanking me for my apology, never giving me one in return but at that point I was free of my own feelings of unforgiveness and hurt. I have had several experiences such as this (times when I reached out and times when people reached out to me) and I was blessed by each. Experiences that I dreaded and feared turned out to be life changing and freeing.

I challenge you to step out of your comfort zone and reach out to someone who hurt or offended you. Maybe you did something to hurt them in return or maybe not ... but reaching out to them in some way (even if it is just sending a card) and truly forgiving them in your heart can be an amazing and freeing experience. Pray before hand that God will lead you in how to go about this and ask His protection and His guidance. Let go of your resentment and let God heal your heart! Watch as this changes your relationship with God as well ... when we let go of unforgiveness He can work even deeper in our lives and bring us closer to Him.

Challenge Part II - That Yucky Thing Called Pride

2011-04-15T08:30:00.001-06:00

Photo Courtesy ... Dan

"Humility means continual death of self. Continual death of self perfects humility. God honors obedience, not the strife of the flesh. What you tolerate in the flesh, you will not get rid of - despise your chains." -Jackie Jacobson

Pride is an ongoing struggle that we all face and I feel it is appropriate to touch on it in this series. I think you will see (and maybe be surprised) how working through pride can help in our journey toward intimacy with Christ. It is a constant battle in my life and something that takes daily work ... As a teenager I used pride to cover up my insecurities and make myself feel superior over others. This carried over into my adult life and I only recently realized that I wasn't just making myself "feel good" ... I was struggling with pride and it was a serious stronghold in my life.

"Because of the privilege and authority God has given me, I give each of you this warning: Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us." Romans 12:3

Comparing myself with others around me I struggled with feelings of insecurity and insignificance. I was always concerned with what everyone else was doing and more importantly what they thought of me. I remember telling people who were nervous about going into certain situations to just "follow my lead" and walk into the room and act like a complete snob. I would instruct, "Act superior to everyone else and look down on them and then not only will those around you feel insignificant, you will feel power." How terrible is that?! Unfortunately I believed in this method and used it for years. My pride went on to manifest itself in new ways as I dealt with different insecurities. When I began to feel inferior I shut out friends and built walls around myself so it was impossible for them to get in. I would do things to purposely hurt others so that I wouldn't feel hurt. [Sigh] ... Sadly, I played this sick cycle game for a long time.

I took a class last year and one of the topics we discussed was pride. As the instructor went on and on, I sank further and further into my chair. My pride was so much deeper than I realized. It had destroyed friendships and caused much discord. Areas in which I believed I was stronger and more secure were actually areas of weakness and insecurity. Pride was not a handle to hold myself up with but merely a stumbling block that was constantly causing me to fall down. I truly hadn't realized that what I was doing was prideful ... I believed I was surviving the best way I knew how ... I was protecting myself. Wrong! I was only hindering myself from discovering the joys that Jesus had for me. Pride is a serious sin that everyone struggles with in some way or another. Maybe you do not struggle with pride to the extreme that I had, but I know that there isn't one of you out there that hasn't dealt with it in some fashion at some point in your life.

Why is pride so awful? How does it keep us from intimacy with Christ? What's the big deal? In the Bible we are called to follow Christ's example by loving as He loves and living as He lived. When we let foolish pride take over our hearts we are keeping Christ at arms length which leaves Him unable to work at His full potential in our lives. "As believers we are called to exercise humility, self control and meekness. It is humility that triggers God's power to manifest" -Jackie Jacobsen. Christ can do amazing things in our life when we humble ourselves at His feet.

"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up." James 4:10

By humbling ourselves we are admitting to Him that we need Him and that we cannot face our struggles and insecurities alone. So many of us would like to think that we can handle this life without help, but if we are honest with ourselves we know it is impossible to live a fulfilling life without Him. When we submit our pride to Him we allow ourselves to grow in relationship with Him. As we grow in relationship with Him we learn to depend on Him for support and security rather than our own methods. We also grow in our relationships with others.

The chief characteristic and root of Jesus' humble character was that He constantly concealed His worth. Being completely stripped and humbled before His Father first and foremost, made it possible for Him to take a humble position before men as a servant. Without the humble and lowly position Jesus took before man there would be: no possibility of sinlessness or righteousness, no crucifixion- no perfect blood sacrifice- no redemption for mankind, and no healings or deliverances; no words of prophecy, knowledge or miracles. - Jackie Jacobson.

Pride is something that will always be a constant battle in our lives. We need to be adamantly aware of it and put a stop to it when it starts to manifest in our everyday situations. It can come in big waves like the ways that I mentioned I dealt with it. But it can also strike in small, less noticeable ways. I fall under several of the categories of prideful behavior below ... where do you fall? Do you find yourself constantly giving your own two cents (aka, the know it all)? When others share with you about their own life do you find yourself comparing your own stories and situations without listening to what they are saying? Do you struggle with jealousy? Do you struggle with unhealthy rivalry? Are you able to give yourself to Jesus, but find it hard to give yourself to others? Do you drop influential names and connections? Is it hard for you to take correction or submit to authority? Do you flaunt money or possessions?

"For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled (ranked below others who are honored or rewarded), and he who humbles himself (keeps a modest opinion of himself and behaves accordingly) will be exalted (elevated in rank)." Luke 14:11 AMP

Challenge: Day one, go one hour without talking about yourself. Stay in communication with others but take time to listen to them without bringing up your own experiences even if they are they similar to the story you are listening to. Do not compare, complain or give advice- just listen. Day two, repeat the above for half of the day. Day three, go the entire day doing this. This small lesson in learning to put others first and setting ourselves aside is hard but it allows us to practice replacing pride with humility. Watch how people respond when you give them your all. As we learn to submit our pride in small ways we become more aware when it creeps up in larger ways. I am going to practice this too and will be sharing and I am so anxious to hear how this experiment goes for you too! Share your experiences, please!

Prayer: LORD, I ask that You reveal to me all of the ways that pride is influencing my everyday life. Please forgive me for the ways that I have allowed pride to rule in my life. Forgive my unwillingness to let go of self. Help me to be able to humbly submit my pride at your feet. Please give me the strength to tackle this difficult area and help keep me on the path to righteousness. I pray God, that you heal the areas in my life that cause me to be prideful ... shine your grace and forgiveness on me and allow me to experience Your joyful filling up of the Holy Spirit. Continue to walk with me and lead me to the places where I can grow deeper in my relationship with You. Amen.

Quotations and italicized segments other then verses and the prayer are taken from Jackie Jacobson's Led By The Spirit book.

Challenge Part I - Prioritizing Him

2011-04-13T09:15:00.000-06:00

So my journey begins ... I am eagerly seeking to grow closer and develop a deeper relationship with my God. There is so much that I know I need to do to achieve this but where to start? Well, I started with the most obvious - making time for Him!

My heart has heard you say, "Come and talk with me." And my heart responds, "LORD, I am coming." Psalm 27: 8

I have a confession to make ... I sleep with my phone next to my bed. It is the last thing I look at before I go to sleep. Before I even sit up in bed in the morning I reach over and pick it up to check my email. Then I go on to look at facebook and then I lazily roll out of bed and scramble to get the kids and myself ready for the day. I go crazy if I can't check my email right away ... don't even ask how often I check my email throughout the day. Sadly, I have made technology an idol in my life. It has come before almost everything and I am not proud to say that. I badly need to get my priorities in order! If I checked in with God as often as I do my email and facebook, I can't even imagine how much deeper my relationship with Him would be.

So, the very first thing I am doing is keeping my phone plugged into my kitchen wall at night- not next to my bed. This way I will not need to check in before bed and will not have immediate access to it right away in the morning. Also, I have pledged to [gulp] get up early every morning during the week to do quiet time. It is the only time of the day when I can be totally alone in silence to spend quality time with Him. Today my alarm went off at 6:15 and I sleepily got up, avoided the phone and made my way to my living room couch where I did day one of quiet time.

Here are my thoughts on the importance of prioritizing Him better ... and trust me when I say I am reaffirming this lesson for myself more then anyone else. As my bible foot notes put it, "The decision to follow Jesus should not be put off, even though other loyalties compete for our attention." I really struggle with slowing down. I am such a go, go, go person and although I try to make what I am doing about Him I fail to actually "check in with headquarters" as often as I should. How can I make my ministry, my everyday, my life about Him when I fail to put Him first? I need to be filled up with Him if I want to be my best for the world especially if what I am doing is for His glory. It is going to be so hard to slow down and rearrange my crazy schedule but doesn't He deserve my best?

Just think, if we are worn down by life, struggling to make it through each day how much better equipped will we be if we start out by seeking Him? I firmly believe that by giving Him the first part of my day He will in turn not only give me blessings but also make time for everything else I need to get through that day. It's like a balancing act- the scale will always be tipped if I am racing to be super mom, super wife, super writer, super everything all on my own ... I can't possibly keep up. But if I have Him on my side, making Him my number one I think that the scale will be balanced. I can accomplish more, achieve my goals and grow in leaps and bounds if I seek and allow Him to guide me.

"Trust Me enough to spend ample time with Me, pushing back the demands of the day. Refuse to feel guilty about something that is so pleasing to Me, the King of the universe. Because I am omnipotent, I am able to bend time and events in your favor. You will find that you can accomplish more in less time, after you have given yourself to Me in rich communion." -Jesus Calling, Sarah Young

Challenge: I challenge that you sacrifice a part of your day to spend time with Him. Whether that means getting up a little early, staying up a little late, changing your lunch break routine, etc. MAKE time to spend with Him. Read a bible passage or a couple pages of a good devotional. Give Him precious time in prayer and communication. You might not see amazing works happen right away but pay attention to what little things change throughout your day. YES, it will be hard to adjust to making this change. YES, it may disrupt your schedule and seem inconvenient. I promise though, you will be rewarded and this is the best first step to deepening your relationship with Him. Please share what changes you notice as you follow through with this challenge!

Prayer: LORD, I yearn to grow into a more intimate relationship with You. Please help me to make time for you today, tomorrow and this week. Help me to realize the importance of making You my first priority each day. I ask that You reveal yourself to me and shine Your face upon me. Deepen my desire to seek You and give me the strength to follow your guidance. Give me ears to hear Your words and eyes to see Your works in my life. Thank You for Your loving patience and for never giving up on me. Amen.

Photo Credit- http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=1701

Featuring Heather Aynne and Serve One Another In Love

2011-04-11T09:06:00.000-06:00

My Church Doesn’t Look Like That...

This past weekend, I attended a church growth summit. The theme of the summit was tipping the cows that hinder the growth of your church. The very first cow that needed to be tipped was the “my church doesn’t look like that” cow.

How would you react if you saw someone walk into your shirt wearing a tank top, shorts and bare feet? If you wouldn’t bat an eye, kudos to you! I can tell you from my what happened to me yesterday that walking in that way can be a very intimidating experience, especially if your church has a “mature population.” Some people didn’t notice what I was wearing, but I noticed a number of people who gave me disapproving glances as they walked past me. And this is as an established member of the church. Perhaps their knowledge of me and the memory that I stood before them the week before wearing a nice suit skewed their impression but I didn’t feel terribly welcome.

Luckily, many churches have begun to adopt a more casual dress code for Sunday worship. While some people may feel that this is disrespectful to God, I think it’s positive in the sense that a guest walking through the doors for the first time will not be intimidated by feeling under-dressed. If you see the story I posted today on Serve One Another in Love, you will see that even some pastors have cast aside their robes and suits to place them on the same level as their congregation.

If your church is still slightly more formal, I challenge you to dress down for church next week. Wear something that you would never think to wear to church and see how you are received. If you feel uncomfortable, I would encourage you to mention that to your church and explain how their views and reactions are holding the church back from growing. More importantly, they may be driving people out of the church who are in desperate need of the lessons that are being taught. If you attend a casual church, perhaps next week is the week to go all out and dress nicer than you ever would. Judging others based on how they dress when they walk through the doors is a problem at both ends of the spectrum.

It seems like common sense that we would accept guests for who they are but we are often clouded by our own perceptions of what our church looks like. In order to open our doors wide and accept everyone, we need to tip the cow of our own views and simply thank God that He led them to your church family.

Throughout this week, I am going to be posting more information that may help you help your church experience growth in a time when every day there are churches closing their doors. We all need to start taking action if we want God’s kingdom to thrive!

By Heather Aynne
serveinlove.net

Are You Up For A Challenge?

2011-04-07T13:40:00.001-06:00

I recently heard about a book called Radical by David Platt.  I have not read the book although hearing what the author is challenging people to do moved me ... "Take back your faith from the American Dream."   The American Dream ... doesn't that represent everything that we live and work for here in the United States? Isn't the idea of the American Dream meant to inspire and motivate, not only us citizens, but people world wide who have hope for a brighter future? It's painted on billboards, portrayed in movies and written about in books ... who would want anything more then to achieve the goal that we all desperately strive for? I am not promoting this book as I have not read it. I think it would be wonderful to read sometime and I have heard amazing things regarding it although the book is not what I am writing about today- just the idea of taking back our faith ... taking it back from whatever it is that is overshadowing it.

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will" (Romans 12:2).

I have felt a relentless desire to grow deeper in my relationship with God. I love Him. I want my life's work to revolve around Him and bringing others to Him. I know He desires more of me then I am currently giving.  Right now my walk is less exciting and moving then what I would like for it to be. Life is going wonderfully. I am busy doing things that I love doing and all because He has blessed me with amazing opportunities- He is beginning to lead me down a path that I have been prayerful about for so long. I am just missing one little thing ... fulfillment in my everyday walk. I know that He not only wants me to be happy and content, but to be filled to the brim- overflowing with Him. I desire for that fire, that excitement that can hardly be contained!

So, in my quest to light that fire and grow deeper in relationship with Him I have decided to challenge myself. I have identified some of the major areas that I feel keep me and others from getting closer to Him. Yes, there are things that I am not thrilled to work on ... things that will take even more of my time and energy, but I know it will all be worth it in the end. I know that I can be better then I am now if I strive to be the best that I can be for Him; that means giving Him my all- not just my leftovers. I am really excited to start this journey and I can't wait to see what He has in store for me. How much more will I experience when I am giving Him my all?

Maybe you are in a great place and life is going well. Maybe you aren't and your life is in turmoil and distress. Maybe you're simply bored in your everyday walk. Maybe you're desperately seeking. We are all in different places spiritually but I believe that we can ALL do more to grow in our faith. Take back your faith! Take it back from whatever is keeping it from being what it is meant to be. Take it back from your desire to achieve success and the American Dream. Take it back from depression. Take it back from fear. Take it back from the boring and mundane. Take it back from self service.  Take it back from the easy going. Take back your faith! What can God do when we give Him our all? What can we experience? How can we grow? I am up for the challenge and I hope that you are too! It excites me so much to think of the possibilities ... I am expecting the unexpected and eager to follow where He leads.

I will be doing short devotionals on different areas of struggle and will finish each off with a challenge for you and I to pursue. I would love to hear your thoughts along the way. Where are you struggling? What is He doing in your life as you challenge yourself to take back your faith? What praises do you have to share? I ask that you prayerfully consider journeying through this with me. Leave me a comment on Inspiring Excellence's facebook page letting me know that you are taking the challenge! We can encourage each other along the way.

Take back your faith and watch your life radically change!

Featuring ... Fancy Little Things!

2011-04-04T09:03:00.000-06:00

This week I am excited to feature Fancy Little Things! This blog is a wealth of information for women which features multiple different topics - there is something to meet everyones interests! Please stop by FancyLittleThings.com and check out all they have to offer. You won't leave dissapointed!

About Fancy Little Things:

FancyLittleThings.com is a brand new blog featuring 8 topics for women: Projects, Home & Garden, Faith, Relationships, Food, Health, Style & a Book of the Month. This blog is the idea of Editor & Projects Author, Aimee Steckowski of byAimee.com. She’s a writer & website developer with a passion to encourage woman to share their ideas and for small businesses & entrepreneurs to be successful. Also, selfishly, Aimee was eager to find a place to share her simple craft projects & connect with a bigger community. She rallied her friends & mom to take on a topic that they felt passionate about and to begin sharing their thoughts, ideas & photos!

Each day of the week focuses on a different topic:

• All project tutorials, project giveaways and other fun handmade-related things will always be posted on Monday.
• Tuesdays will feature our Home & Garden topic where you will see different projects & décor ideas for both the interior & exterior of your home.
• Each Wednesday will be a guest-featured series on Faith; a Bible study series, sharing of their personal story connected with Bible verses or a chance to dig a little deeper in your Christian walk.
• We have Relationships on Thursday that will answer reader’s questions 3 weeks each month.
• Friday is all about FOOD! Recipes, kitchen gadgets, how-to’s and ideas for how to feed a family on a regular budget!
• The end the week with Health & Wellness tips, exercise advice and activities on Saturday.
• Style will make a splash on Sundays with tricks and ideas to be trendy, modern & still keep your personal style at the forefront.
• Our Book of the Month will be featured on Saturdays a few time each month. A new book will be introduced along with discussion questions and other reading-related articles.

You are sure to find something on this blog for you! You can check them out by going to their website, subscribing to their blog, “liking” them on Facebook or following them on Twitter.

Am I Waiting For God or Is He Waiting For Me?

2011-04-03T00:05:00.005-06:00

"But those who wait for the Lord (who expect, look for and hope in Him) shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up (closer to God) like eagles. They shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired" -Isaiah 40:31 AMP.

I have journeyed a long road in trying to figure out who I am, what I am meant to be, where I am supposed to go. I knew He had amazing plans for my life, but what those were exactly was a mystery to me. After wishing and hoping that God would reveal to me His great plan for my life and then not seeing any results, I became discouraged. Why was it so hard to find the answers to my questions?

After reading Isaiah 40:31 many times and really applying myself and my life to it, I gradually began to see that it would take more then "wishing" to get to where I wanted to be. Those who expect something to grow or happen over night are foolish and I had been that fool. Faith comes gradually and by practice. When we plant a seed does it sprout as we sleep that very same night? No, we must care for it by watering it and giving it sun light. It is a continued cycle of dedicated time and attention. If we devote our efforts to this plant, we can proudly watch it sprout, grow and become something beautiful and fruitful. If we neglect it, it withers away to nothing.

The same goes with our faith. I had been expecting to grow by starving myself spiritually and became frustrated when I didn't get the immediate answers that I was after. I can understand Jesus, love Him, desire to be in relationship with Him, but if I'm not willing to do what it takes to have relationship with Him I am lost. In Revelation 3:20 Jesus calls out to us saying, "Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me." If I'm not willing to open the door, how will I have community with Him? After all, Jesus never forces His way in, we must invite Him.

By learning to expect, look for, listen and hope my faith began to grow exponentially. It is exciting knowing all that can happen and be revealed by Him by simply following through and giving myself ample opportunity to learn and grow. We aren't born mature Christian individuals. Hearing God's voice takes practice. Without really learning to tune into Him and listen to His words, we cannot honestly hear Him. When we are open and willing He can work in marvelous ways! Can I now see every step where He is leading me? No, but aren't we called to walk by faith? Do I know exactly the plans He has laid out for me? Not exactly but I have a better idea. I am at peace knowing that His plans will come to life and in the meantime I am loving the growth and closeness of our relationship.

Do you struggle with figuring out the plans God has for your life? Do you feel like you are stumbling around in the dark waiting for Him to shine the light down on you? I encourage you to invite Jesus in and find new ways to grow in Him. Try a new bible study, read a new book in the bible that you have never read, start a journal (!), try out expecting Him to move in your life rather then wishing, read one encouraging verse every morning before you start your day, ask Him to reveal Himself to you everyday ... there a many ways to grow, you just need to find them and dedicate yourself to them- then watch things happen!

Give Away Winner ...

2011-04-01T12:04:00.000-06:00

Heather at serveinlove.net ... you are the winner!!! Thanks to everyone for your comments and everything ... I hope you enjoyed learning more about some of the different names of God. I encourage you all to read the book Trusting In The Names Of God by Catherine Martin ... it is seriously life changing and can deepen your relationship with Him so much. Stay tuned for more give aways to come at the end of April!

I can't wait to feature Heather ... be sure to check her out at Inspiring Excellence soon!

Abba, Daddy

2011-03-31T11:25:00.012-06:00

My husband and I love song lyrics. They tell such amazing stories and stir up all kinds of great feelings and emotions. Since our first daughter was born seven years ago we have found a specific song for each of our three girls that described our feelings towards them each individually; a song that we dedicated to them and labeled as "their song". My husband chose the Kenny Chesney song There Goes My Life for our middle daughter. She loves listening to it and loves when her daddy sings it to her. She could listen to it over and over again.

The other day they were out running an errand together and that song came on the stereo. The part of the song that says,

Oh yeah..........he loves that little girl.

Momma's waiting to tuck her in,
As she fumbles up those stairs.
She smiles back at him dragging that teddy bear.
Sleep tight, blue eyes and bouncin' curls.

He smiles.....
There goes my life.
There goes my future, my everything.
I love you, daddy good-night.

My husband was singing along with it and glanced in the rear view mirror and realized that our daughter was in tears. He quickly asked her what was wrong and she said, "Daddy these are happy tears. I am happy because you love me so much." It was one of those precious moments that he will never forget. Her gentle little four year spirit recognized the great love that her daddy had for her and it moved her to tears ... beautiful!

"Jesus addressed His Father in a special, most intimate way when He was in the depth of suffering- His dark night of the soul. He was in the Garden of Gethsemane just before His arrest and crucifixion on the cross. He prayed, 'Abba! Father! All things are possible for You; remove this cup from Me; yet not what I will, but what You will' (Mark 14:36). Abba is the Aramaic word translated 'Father' and is used in the spirit of a tender, affectionate child in much the same way as a child today would use the word daddy. Jesus used Father in His prayers much more often than other Jewish teachers and writers. Because of our new relationship with God through Christ, we may employ this display of affection, this expression of endearment, Abba, Father." - Catherine Martin, Trusting In The Names Of God Devotional.

The Great Yahweh who created the Heavens and earth is our Father ... our Daddy if you will. We are His precious children and nothing, and I mean nothing, in all eternity means more to Him then us. He weeps when we when are hurting, He basks in joy and excitement when we are happy, He is heartbroken when we turn away from Him. His love for us is never ending and pure. We have the incredible privilege of coming to Him in the intimate way a child goes to their daddy.

When we are hurting we can turn to Him and take refuge in His loving arms and His arms are ALWAYS open and willing to take us in. No matter what we have done, even if we have walked away He is still lovingly waiting for our return ... no strings attached. He provides the most pure love that we could ask for.

Charles Spurgeon says, "If an earthly father watches over his children with unceasing love and care, how much more does our heavenly Father?" Maybe you have experienced unconditional love through your earthly father, maybe you haven't ... no matter the circumstance you have Abba who loves you dearly. Get to know Him, rest in Him, delight in Him. There is nothing He desires more then you. He gave His precious life so that you may have life. Catherine Martin asks, "Will you crawl up into the lap of your Abba, Father now and lay all your cares and worries in His loving arms?"

In Closing This Series:
I encourage you all to read the book Trusting In The Names of God by Catherine Martin. I have explored in my blog, Yahweh, Yahweh Nissi, Yahweh Jireh and Abba which are some of my favorites. Her book explores many more of His names that are so incredible. When your really get to know our LORD in all His different elements, it allows for such a deeper understanding and appreciation of Him. Dig into this book and watch your faith grow in beautiful strides.

Give Away & Chance To Promote Your Blog!

2011-03-29T20:53:00.001-06:00

I am finishing up my short series on some of my favorite names of God inspired by Catherine Martin's, Trusting In The Names of God. I am ending it with a fun giveaway that I think you will LOVE!

This Friday I will be doing my first drawing ... The winner of my drawing will recieve a copy of Martin's, Trusting In The Names of God and a featured guest spot on my blog!

How do you enter to win? #1 Leave a comment on any of the Names of God posts. #2 Subscribe to my blog OR "like" my Inspiring Excellence facebook page (see link in the right hand side bar of this page).

I will announce the winner this Friday at noon mountain time. If you win, you will recieve the book and be scheduled for a featured spot on my blog this April. If you are looking to bring new readers to your blog, this is a great opportunity! Can't wait to hear from you ...

The Eternal I AM

2011-03-29T12:46:00.000-06:00

But Moses protested, “If I go to the people of Israel and tell them, ‘The God of your ancestors has sent me to you,’ they will ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what should I tell them?” God replied to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM. Say this to the people of Israel: I AM has sent me to you.” God also said to Moses, “Say this to the people of Israel: Yahweh, the God of your ancestors—the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob—has sent me to you. This is my eternal name, my name to remember for all generations.” -Exodus 3:13-15.

Until I read Martin’s chapter on Yahweh, I never really grasped the power behind His name. Yes, I "feared" God and I knew that He was the Almighty, Most High, Creator of heaven and earth but the power never really hit me until I learned more about it.

A little background on the name Yahweh: The Hebrews revered His name as so incredibly Holy that they would not even write or speak the name Yahweh in its entirety. The name held such importance and power that they felt unworthy to let it roll off their lips. They usually replaced it with Adonai or my lord.

If you think about it “god” is a general term. Many cultures worshipped different gods. A god was, and still is, considered a greater power and an unknown deity. Around the world different cultures claim to worship the same god but through a different name … but He isn’t just a god … He is THE GOD. He has ONE name. I think it’s fascinating that God showed the world who He was through His name. He isn’t known as just “God” the unknown deity. He personified himself by using a name. He is set apart.

I always think of Moses asking God who he should call Him when addressing the people of Israel, “I AM, WHO I AM” (Exodus 3:14). Or when Jesus said, "'I tell you the truth … before Abraham was born, I am!'" (John 8:58). "I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End” (Revelation 22:13). It literally gives me chills to think about those words. My lowly words cannot even express the significance of what that means. HE WAS, HE IS, HE IS TO COME.

Think of Him … His power, His image, His ultimate majesty ... If you truly grasp and understand the depth of His being, how could you not fear Him? I know that for me personally, after I recognized the significance of His infinite power I dropped to the floor on my knees, head buried in the floor. I felt so unworthy and small. It’s unreal to imagine that He in all His glory could love me, little ol’ Sarah, but He does … The "I AM" is my God and though unworthy, I am so grateful of His love and adoration of me.

There is a song out there by Phillips Craig and Dean that I think truly puts into words Yahweh in all His greatness. I highly encourage you to read the lyrics or listen to the song here . Draw near to Him and give Him the praise and adoration that He deserves. Thank Him for simply being Him.

Yahweh Jireh, The Lord Will Provide

2011-03-25T09:00:00.003-06:00

The six month of his unemployment was about to dawn. We had used what little savings we had to cover our costs for the previous five months and we were literally down to the last few dollars. He had sent out hundreds of copies of his resume, been on dozens of interviews and nothing ... We had made it this far and been ok but what next? What happens when those last few dollars are spent and our income is non-existent? There are three children here .... How will we feed them? Will we lose our house? An indescribable fear hung over our heads as we contemplated our future. I pleaded with God saying, "Please, please, please God open up doors of opportunity. Take care of us as we continue through this time of uncertainty. Please provide for our family and don't let us drown."

And then a day like any other day came upon us. He was off to yet another interview. His stomach was in knots as he believed that this interview, like all the others would result in nothing, leaving us at the bottom of an empty well. I went about my afternoon caring for the girls as usual when the phone rang ... "Well ???" I asked expecting to hear another "we'll call you if we find that you're a fit". He answered back, "Well they loved me. They took me right in to talk to the Colonel and he hired me on the spot! I start immediately." My heart lept as relief washed over me... Amazing! He got a job- and not just any job, a job in the field that he had been pursuing. A job that would not only take care of our family, but that he would be extremely happy in- something he hadn't been in years. God answered our prayers ... He provided for us in our deepest time of need.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Can you imagine how Abraham felt as he traveled up Mount Moriah knowing that he was about to sacrifice his son? To lose a child is a tragedy in and of itself but to lose a child that God blessed him and Sarah with, a child that fulfilled such a significant promise ... I cannot imagine that angst he felt as he made that journey. Despite everything he obeyed God and didn't question His command. When Abraham reached the point where he was instructed to sacrifice Issac he laid down his son and raised his arm, knife in hand ... "Lay down the knife, " the angel said. "Do not hurt the boy in any way, for now I know that you truly fear God. You have not withheld even your beloved son from me." Then Abraham looked up and saw a ram caught by its horns in a bush. So he took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering on the alter in place of his son. Abraham named the place, "The Lord Will Provide" ... (Genesis 22:12-14).

Yahweh Jireh, The Lord Will Provide. Throughout the Bible we see other examples of God providing for needs that seemed otherwise impossible to meet. Jesus fed five thousand people with five loaves of bread and two fishes. After a night of catching nothing, Jesus instructed His disciples to cast their nets on the other side of the boat and they were overwhelmed with the enormous catch. Peter caught a fish that held a coin, a coin that would pay his taxes. The Lord will provide!

Today we still face various needs. Whether the needs be monetary, emotional or physical we all have them! Take heart that God is a God who provides. God does not wish to see you drown in your troubles. He has the ability to help you through anything and He wants to help you through everything. Trust in His provisions. When you think that there is no hope and that there is no way that life could iron itself out trust in His provisions! Seek Him and make your requests known to Him and don't get discouarged if His provision isn't exactly what you had in mind ... He sees things crystal clear and His plan and provisions may be better then what we expected! I close with a verse that so simply expressess His desire and intent to provide for us ...

"Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?" Matthew 6:26-30

Trusting In The Names of God - Intro

2011-03-23T16:53:00.000-06:00

A couple of years ago I read the book, Trusting In The Names Of God by Catherine Martin ... if you haven't read it already I highly recommend it! God has recently put that book and its message on my heart again so, I am going back through it and want to share some thoughts with you along the way. To start, I am re-posting an old post I wrote on my favorite name of God. I hope that you enjoy these next couple weeks as I journey back through Trusting In The Names Of God ... God has really placed this topic on my heart and encouraged me to share! Stay tuned for a fun give-away coming soon!

In my quiet time today I was led to read my Trusting In The Names Of God book by Catherine Martin. The book talks about all the different names of God and what they mean, how to use them, etc. I turned to the chapter on Trusting in Yahweh Nissi – He is your Victory. It spoke to me and a dozen of you came to mind. I felt called to speak this message, if you will, to you. I thought I would highlight some of what the chapter talks about and hope that I don’t bore you but instead inspire you to know that despite your present circumstances Yahweh Nissi (God) is on your side fighting your battles and if you let Him, He will bring you victory!

“What does knowing Yahweh Nissi tell you about yourself? You need someone to fight for you and bring victory in your life. The Lord is the one who fights for you. Run to Yahweh Nissi when you need victory in the battle you face today. What will the banner of the Lord look like in your life? Some scholars suggest that Moses’ upraised hands represented prayers and petitions and intercession on behalf of the people of God in the heat of the battle.

What banner do you hold in your life? Is Yahweh Nissi your banner? Or do you carry the banner of self, believing you are the only one to fight the battle? Or do you carry the banner of money, believing if only could be a millionaire, you could win your war? Or is the banner of position your reliance, believing if only you could have the perfect job, your problem, whatever it may be, will be solved?

When you are in the heat of the battle, think of Moses and the staff in his hand. When he had the staff high (trusting and following God’s commands) in his hands, Israel won, and when it fell, they began to lose. And so it is with you – defeat is sure if you hold up any banner but Yahweh Nissi. Victory is certain if you hold high your banner, Yahweh Nissi. Look to the Lord to fight your battles. Cry out to Him. The Lord will give you wisdom every step of the way as He leads you.

Pray in the heat of the battle and watch the Lord win the battle – He is victor! Oh, how exciting to watch Yahweh Nissi gain the victory in a life, whether that life is your life, a family member’s or a friend’s. Joy is your great response in praising Yahweh Nissi. Nehemiah taught the people of God, ‘The joy of the Lord is your strength!’ How can you rejoice in Him today? ‘Great are the works of the Lord; they are studied by all who delight in them. Splendid and majestic is His work and His righteousness endures forever!’ Psalm 11:2-3” -Trusting In the Names of God, Catherin Martin.

Last words – from ME!

Times are tough for everyone right now. We are all facing different battles today, this week, this month and this year. I feel pledged to tell you that you are not alone! Ask Him to help you, stay in His presence, petition your needs to Him, and intercede for those around you who are struggling … He will answer. Our God is not a God who neglects or turns His back. He LOVES us and He wants us to succeed and prosper. He does not desire to see you bound to the ground in hopelessness and despair. He desires you to stay with Him and trust Him. If you let Him, He will bring you out of your battle as the winner!!! And most importantly, it is so easy for us to come to God with our problems and plead for help (He wants us to!) but even in the midst of our battles we need to praise Him! Like the last couple of sentences above we must have joy in the Lord as that is our strength! I encourage you read the words of the song, ‘Praise You In This Storm' by Casting Crowns.

I encourage you friends and family who are struggling to turn to Him, don’t turn away, place yourself closer then ever before and He will show you a victory in your battle. You, my friend, cannot win it yourself, you are simply incapable, but with Him you can do anything! I will remember you and your situation in my prayers this week …

A Deep Understanding

2011-03-21T11:24:00.000-06:00

I woke up today with a heavy heart. My dreams often haunt me and expose the darkest parts of my soul. Sometimes I remember the dream while other times I have no recollection of them although I wake up utterly shaken and the darkness of it weighs heavily. I awake with feelings of deep sorrow, confusion and pain. Where did this come from and why did it have to plague me today? Why when everything is good and right do these dreams come in and stick a knife in my heart?

I opened up my Jesus Calling book after I got up and came across this: "Come to Me for understanding, since I know you far better then you know yourself. I comprehend you in all your complexity; no detail of your life is hidden from Me. I view you through eyes of grace, so don't be afraid of My intimate awareness. Allow the Light of My healing Presence to shine into the deepest recesses of your being- cleansing, healing, refreshing, and renewing you ... I speak to you from the depths of your being. Hear me saying soothing words of Peace, assuring you of My Love. Do not listen to the voices of accusation, for they are not from Me ... My Spirit convicts cleanly, without crushing words of shame. Let the Spirit take charge of your mind, combing out tangles of deception" (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young, p80 & 82).

Wow, so beautiful! I often forget the depths of His understanding. It is easy to remember that He created me and breathed life into me- those truths were drilled into my head as a child. What I tend to forget is that not only did He create me but He knows me better then I know myself. He sees and understands the complexities of my heart, which so often I don't even understand! As I wake up and relive these huntings I am not alone; He is right there next to me. What a comfort to know that there is another who can feel my pain, see my struggle and truly understand it. I may not immediately resolve the issues that these hauntings root from but I am learning how to peacefully put them to rest and move forward with my day. I am able to take comfort in His presence and fill up with His strength.

There is something incredible about His intimate knowledge of our hearts. I think it brings us to a whole new level and awareness of His love. He sees those dark things that plague us. He understands them. He STILL loves us despite them. He doesn't grow tired of our constant inward battles, in fact He lifts us up and carries us through them if we allow Him. If you struggle with similar hurt and pain remember to take comfort in His understanding and seek refuge in His arms. Draw from His strength and find peace.

"O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away ... Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts." -Psalm 139 1-2, 23

An Answered Prayer

2011-03-19T09:54:00.000-06:00

"Thank you, Thank you, Thank you God!" These are the words that were excitedly running through my head as it hit the pillow last night. I probably fell asleep with a smile on my face. This week has been an answer to prayer in so many wonderful ways and I am thrilled to say the least.

When I was a child I wanted to be a writer. As I grew up things began to change and I didn't think I had what it took to accomplish that dream. Without encouragement and also a lack of practice for that matter it became more and more of a vague dream and soon I totally forgot about it.

Over the last few years I really began to become aware of my gift of exhortation. God gave me something beautiful ... something that I could do so much with. As I prayed and prayed that God would build this gifting up in me I wondered how He would use me ...

About two years ago I randomly started a blog ... My husband was in military training and away from our family for six months and I found that writing really helped ease my loneliness. I quickly fell in love with blogging, the only problem was that nobody really read it. Never the less I kept going and God kept working in my heart. He gave me so much to say. I began to see that I could use my exhortation through writing. I didn't write fluffy things to make my people feel sunny and bright but instead I used my own life circumstances to try to relate with people. I'm a real person going through real struggles. It isn't always sunny and bright- it's hard and sometimes it sucks- BUT He is always there to walk me through those struggles and He gets me to the other side safely. I've learned that by humbling myself (which is a HUGE ongoing process in me!) and letting people see my struggles I am offering something that other people can connect with.

Still, I didn't really have any readers other then a couple good friends and of course my family. It kind of got frustrating and I felt like I was wasting my time. Writing had again become my passion and yearning, but I had nobody to share in it with. But, I still kept writing. After a year and a half I stumbled across the incourage submission page. I half heartedly submitted something that I wrote last summer and then didn't think about it again. Although I was enjoying writing, I was very insecure about my writing abilities. I didn't think anything would come of it. Boy was I surprised to get an email saying that I would be posted in March ... I was elated!!!

Having my article up on Thursday literally changed everything. It was an amazing feeling to have so many strangers from around the world reading my simple words. I was so blessed by the response! The next day, yesterday, I found the incourage community site ... (smile and emotional tears) ... I can't express to you the sheer joy and excitement I have for this treasure. I have been searching and praying for something like this community for so long and at last He brought me to it. The immediate response from all of the wonderful women was amazing. I felt apart of a family right away. Knowing that I can write the things that He has laid on my heart and be able to reach even a couple of people's hearts and encourage them is enough to happily sustain me for a long time. Likewise, I am so thrilled and honored to be able to return the favor and enlighten myself through their writing and words! I am so very excited for the opportunity be apart of this group of women and to share among them.

Sometimes God renews childhood dreams ... Sometimes He closes doors for a while so that He can mature us so that when the door re-opens we are better equipped for what He has in store. It's an exciting journey and I am so blessed to be on it. This week has comforted me, inspired me and proved to me once again that He knows what He is doing!

Stand By Me? Ok ... Maybe ...

2011-03-16T15:02:00.001-06:00

1 Thessalonians 5:11 "So encourage each other and build each other up ..."

I hate going to the gym ... you practically have to tie me up and drag me there. You would probably never see me running on the treadmill if it were up to me showing up on my own. I know it's good for me and that it's important but I don't like it ... plain and simple. The times that I am there and stick with the routine of going are when I am with my girlfriends. There is something about having that support person with you that makes it so much easier to endure. She encourages me while I trudge through and provides the support that I need. In the end I feel so great about going and doing something good for myself !

The same can be true in other areas of our life. We all face struggles at some point in our lives ... whether it be the struggle of a hard day at home with the little ones, the struggle of a crumbling marriage, the struggle of a daunting project, the struggle with a loss of a job or a loved one ... Who can you turn to when those issues hit?

I am a very independent person. I don't like to accept help, I don't like people to know when I am struggling and I often times try to resolve my issues on my own in the quiet of my own little world.  It is very hard for me to let people in and see me when I am weak.  If I let my guard down, won't people see my vulnerability and look down on me? Isn't it safer to just keep it all in and try to get through it on my own? It is certainly more comfortable to do things that way ...

Over the last year God has been teaching me so much about humility. I've learned that keeping my insecurities, fears and struggles inside just because I am afraid of what people will think about me is pride. Maybe He is letting me face these struggles because my experiences will help me make an even more powerful impact on someone else then if I just try to comfort alone.

I've been blessed with some amazing friends who have patiently watched me slowly break down the walls of my pride. They stand by me and support me through my struggles, encourage me when I am down and make me comfortable enough to open up about the hard things. When they see me open up and share they are comfortable to do the same. We tackle life so much better in teams and it is so much more joyful to share in celebration when we have made it through together.

God has blessed us with community. He wanted us to have fellowship with others and be able to lean on each other in good times and bad. We aren't made to sit alone and try to fix our problems ourselves. Isn't it awesome that He has given us such a wonderful gift?! Next time you are facing struggles that you are scared of sharing or seeking support about, consider letting someone in. Sometimes He uses other people as tools to do His mighty works in our lives.  As with the gym situation, sometimes having a companion walk with you through the daunting situations in life allows things to be so much easier and more manageable. Likewise, we should remember to be on the watch for our friends facing difficult times. Offer encouragement, lift them up in prayer and be the friend that you would want there for you.

What impact has supportive friends had on your life? Do you find that the dark situations are easier to handle when you let someone in rather then dwelling in them alone?

The Battlefield For Our Minds

2011-03-08T11:32:00.002-07:00

One of the strongholds that I face in life is looking backward rather then forward. I am often tormented with the "what if's" ... What if I had made different choice's? What if I would have taken another road? What if I would have worked harder in this area? What if I would have just waited? What if I had been more careful about what I said? ... When I get into these ruts I begin to quickly drown in depression and anxiety. It is not a good place to dwell.

I recently started reading The Rules Of Engagement by Cindy Trimm. Cindy showed me that my "what if" problem was much easier to overcome then I thought. "The most precious commodity in the earth realm is the mind. Not only is God vying for our minds, but the enemy is vying for your mind as well" (Trimm, 40). So often we forget that there is a spiritual battle going on around us. Our souls are constantly being fought for.

Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

The enemy is always there whispering lies into our minds. He too knows our weakness, our hurts, our desires and he slithers his way in and feeds on that. He takes advantage of that knowledge and creates thoughts in our heads to make us believe that they are our own and that we should act on them. He plants ideas, strife and confusion and if we are ignorant to his deceitful tools we fall victim and are seduced in. Isn't that a horrible thought?

It sounds so daunting and dark ... how can we escape it? How can we take control of our minds and keep the enemy out? The great news is that God is all powerful and will always prevail and win out in the end. He is all we need and He will conquer. When we immerse ourselves in His Word and stay prayerful in all things, we silence the enemy. Prayer invades darkness. Through prayer and petition we should seek daily protection from God, that He would not only keep us physically safe but also protect our mind and spirit.

Ephesians 6:13-18 Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared. In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.

Now when I start to dip into the "what if's" I quickly turn my thoughts to the Lord. He knows every detail of my life ... where I have been, where I am going, my heart and my desires and He has my best interest at heart. I am His precious child and He LOVES me deeply. So, the "what if's" don't matter anymore. They aren't healthy, they aren't me and they don't root from God. I prayerfully submit those thoughts to Him, put Him back in control and breathe a sigh of relief. It is wonderful to feel those burdens lift and have His peace wash over me.

Be adamantly aware of the enemy and his influences. Don't go through life oblivious to his deceitful demise or he will get the best of you. Cover yourself in the Holy Spirit and keep your thoughts centered around the Lord. The difference that it makes is astounding and so freeing!

Can you think of times when you were all of a sudden consumed by depression, regret, anger or anxiety? How do you fight back and surrender mind control to the Lord?

Oh Where Oh Where Has My Inspiration Gone?

2011-02-16T14:44:00.000-07:00

Where has the time gone? It seems like forever since I have sat here and written ... When I write, I write to inspire, encourage, uplift and challenge. Whether the talent is there or not is debatable but I believe it is a gift from God and that He uses me as a tool to reach others. So what does that have to do with my absence? Read on and you'll see ...

For the last few months I have struggled, not with my faith but in my faith. To put it plainly I became lazy. I loved my Jesus deeply but it became an effort to pick up my bible, to pray, to do my bible study, etc. Sometimes it was easier to look the other way and do what was easiest - to please the flesh. Nothing too dramatic, just me being selfish and putting myself ahead of Him ... a lot. I'm not afraid to admit that because I don't feel like I ever pretend to be somebody that I'm not. I'm human ... I fall short, I have been known to make a poor choice or two and I struggle just like everyone else.

After going through a period of serious struggle last spring with my husbands job situation and everything that came along with that I was exhausted from praying and pleading with God. It took a huge emotional toll on my husband and I. Our God came through for us, provided for us and gave us a sweet victory in the end, but then it seemed like after everything went from bad to good, we stopped relying on God. We didn't have to come and present our pleas and burdens to Him because life was pretty good. Unintentionally, I think we felt that life was in a place that we could handle things ourselves. I let myself drift away. Big mistake ...

While nothing crashed and burned, I felt more and more empty. I LOVE to write. I am passionate about words. I LOVE the feeling of being overwhelmed with the possibilities and directions that my writing can take. I LOVE hearing God speak to me and the feeling that comes with connecting with Him. When in relationship with Him there comes a feeling of closeness and security that you cannot find anywhere else. I missed that. I missed hearing Him and I missed being inspired by Him. When you don't stop and listen to Him, you can't hear Him. It gets pretty quiet on both ends.

It's funny because when I was at a low point in my life yet still relying on Him, His words and encouragement flowed through me like crazy. I was inspired with incredible things. We were connected, communicating and in relationship with each other. After letting myself drift away from that relationship everything fell into a quiet lull and I knew I needed to make a change. After a lot of prayer and pressing in I came to a place where I started to connect again. By just adding Him back into my life a little at a time and giving Him the time that He so desired from me things began to change. I feel that old familiar tug at my spirit. I feel the urge to learn and grow. It is awesome! One of the big lessons I learned from this time away is that as much as we want to use our gifts, reach others and make a difference we are nothing without Him. When I was disconnected I could not think of a single thing to say. I wanted to write, but there was nothing there.

What it comes down to is that we all need Him to be the best that we are capable of being. Life can be easy, rewarding and fulfilling but it can be even BETTER if He is a part of it. He can take our talents and push us to levels we never imagined or ever gotten to on our own. Don't just rely on Him when things are tough and trying, make Him the ruler of your entire life, bad and good. He can make the good sweeter then ever if you let Him. So ... I'm back ... The prodigal daughter has returned. The ideas are flowing, my heart is back in the right place, I have learned a valuable lesson and I am ready to press into Him and see where He takes me.

Your Life Is Going to Change Me

2010-09-22T14:27:00.005-06:00

"Wherever you are, whenever it's right,

You'll come outta nowhere and into my life."

When my second child was only nine months old, I found out that I was pregnant again. So many people that I know (and don't know for that matter) would have been thrilled at that kind of surprise, but I was devastated. The news came completely out of left field and we were shocked to say the least. Our family was not in a stable financial place. We already had two very young children and it was a challenge enough with them. Neither one of our cars were big enough for three car seats, our house was only a three bedroom ... three kids would mean a lot of changes.

I struggled so much with accepting the pregnancy and it took a huge emotional toll on me. Fear ruled my emotions as I was so scared to be bringing another child into the world and felt like the timing couldn't have been worse. Why would God throw this on us during a time when we were struggling in so many other areas? It didn't seem fair. Selfishly, I stayed in my self pity for a few months. I didn't allow myself to feel any joy or excitement and instead fell into depression.

One day, while at an event that my Mom was hosting I ended up in a conversation with one of the other guests. Without me even bringing up my disappointment about my pregnancy she looked at me and said, "Sometimes the best gifts are those that we least expect or that drop into our laps at the most inconvenient times. God is going to use this child in mighty ways and she will surpass everything you could ever wish for, for her." Wow ... I was blown away!

At that moment, I remembered the verse that I had heard so many times before, "For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11. I felt so ashamed for my actions. Yes, this was an inopportune time, we weren't ready, we were scared, we had no clue how it was going to work but God created this child specifically for us, to not only bless us but to bless the world. She was our incredible gift from Him. All of the little details didn't matter anymore. It would work. God knew my heart. He knew our family. Before the beginning of time, He knew that we were meant to be together.

"And I know that we can be so amazin'

And baby your love is gonna change me

And now I can see every possibility

Somehow I know that it’ll all turn out

You'll make me work so we can work to work it out

And I promise you kid I'll give so much more than I get

I just haven't met you yet."

Almost three years later that baby is a beautiful, bouncing child who is filled with joy from head to toe. Things haven't always been foot loose and fancy free, but we have made it. She adds so much zest to our family and we would never be complete without her smiling face. Though she can definitely be a feisty little thing and she challenges me like no other, she is exactly who God created her to be and I love her to pieces for that. She never ceases to amaze me and I am convinced everyday that this little girl is going to be something utterly amazing. God is going to work through her and do incredible things in her life.

So often I look at her and remember back to feeling so hopeless and scared- although now I am comforted by those memories because God has proved to remain faithful and true to His Word. Sometimes the best gifts are those that we least expect or that drop into our laps at the most inconvenient times. Be thankful for the surprises that God throws your way. He can bless our socks off, even in the midst of hardship and doubt.

"And I know that we can be so amazin'

And bein' in your life is gonna change me

And now I can see every single possibility

And someday I know it'll all turn out

And I'll work to work it out

Promise you kid I’ll give more than I get"

Michael Buble

A Little Dose of Humility

2010-09-14T15:20:00.001-06:00

Proverbs 16:18-19 "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Better to be lowly in spirit and among the oppressed than to share plunder with the proud."

Recently I had the opportunity to suck up my pride and humble myself like never before. If you know me, you know that I rarely bring myself to that level ... it's hard. Pride is a sin that every one of us struggles with. It plagues us and can ruin relationships and other things that we hold dear in our lives. It also builds walls and keep us from God. I learned the hard way what happens when we allow pride to rule our hearts and minds.

A few years ago a very good friend of mine, who happened to live up the street from me, moved away. Our families were very good friends and we had strong bonds between us. We spent a lot of time with these people. They were the type of friends who you could call at 5:00 p.m. on a Saturday night and say, "whats for dinner?" and just show up at their door five minutes later. Even though they only moved a few minutes away, I was devastated to lose the close connection that we had shared as close neighbors as well as friends. I also wished that my own family were at the point in which we were ready to move into a bigger house and frankly there was some jealousy brewing in my heart.

To keep myself from feeling replaced, envious and sad I completely shut these friends out. I made no attempts to have any sort of remnant of our previous friendship. This went on for two years. Did I feel better as planned? Sometimes it didn't bother me at all as I numbed myself pretty well. Other times I would terribly miss my friends and the closeness that we shared. My friend on the other hand had come to me on a few separate occasions, very upset and completely in the dark as to what had happened to our friendship. I flat out lied, made up excuses and brushed her off. I knew in my heart that to mend this friendship I would have to come clean and honestly it was easier to lose a great friend then to admit my pride. Isn't that sad? Pride can do awful things to your heart.

During my prayer time I, clear as day heard God to tell me that I had to deal with this. Even when I continued to brush off His words, He kept drilling it in to my head. When God wants you to do something, you do it. If you don't, He will find a way to get things done another way. After months and months of praying about the situation I finally made the decision to do the right thing although I was sick to my stomach about it. Knowing that I caused such a wonderful friend such pain because of my own selfish pride was a very hard thing to admit- especially to her! And God wasn't about let me to write an email ... I had to tell her to her face.

I met up with my friend, which was terribly uncomfortable. I won't lie, there was a reason that we met for margarita's! I just opened my mouth and let it all spill out. I admitted my sin, owned up to everything that I had done and asked for her forgiveness. Surprisingly, she got teary eyed and gladly accepted my apology and forgave me for everything. She didn't point any fingers or hold anything against me. She welcomed back her "prodigal friend" and I was very happy. That was even more humbling!

Instead of feeling exposed, lowely and awful like I thought I would feel after completely humbling myself, I felt free. Free to just let go all of those weighing feelings that pinned me down for some long. Free to finally let things be the way they were supposed to, without pressure, without keeping up a fake fisade or anything else. It will take time for my friend and I to come to the place that we were once at, but I am confidant that when God brings such great people into our lives, if we obey Him, He will guide those relationships back to where He can bless us through them again.

This is probably the hardest thing I have ever done. Nobody likes to admit when they have caused strife and hurt people. Nobody likes to be seen as weak or vulnerable either. As a person who holds herself up very strongly and depends on others for very little, this brought me to my knees and humbled me greatly. I challenge you to look at where your pride lies ... we all have it in some place or another. Pray on that and ask God what He wants you to do with it. You might be surprised at how freeing it really is to let go and let God. When you let go of your pride you also allow Him to work in your life and bestow even greater blessings on your own life. Psalms 149:4 "For the LORD takes delight in his people; he crowns the humble with salvation."

Family

2010-07-17T14:11:00.000-06:00

"Listen, my son, to your father's instruction and do not forsake your mother's teaching." Proverbs 1:8

Today I am thinking of my family. Not everyone is as lucky as I to have such an amazing family. Growing up I learned just how important family was at a very early age. We were always tightly connected with our extended relatives. Whether they lived near or far, I knew my family and appreciated them for exactly who they were. We spent holidays together, went on weekend trips to my grandfathers cabin together, celebrated together, etc. I remember our "family time" to be so fun. Even when there was drama, I loved being around my family. No matter how complicated or crazy things got or still get with my family I will always look at them as my people ... my family. We share a history and are connected and when it comes down to it, that means something.

My immediate family was equally amazing and had a huge impact on who I am today. As a child and teenager I fought with my parents so much. Since I had terrible grades and was interested in being a social butterfly more than anything else I was hardly ever in agreement with my parents and I felt that they were very hard me. I was grounded more then any kid that I knew, I just couldn't get it right. I'm sure that as much as I thought I was being treated utterly unfairly, my parents were dealing with their own struggle of trying to figure out how to parent/manage me. I'm sure there were times that they probably thought I was a lost cause.

Once I got through high school (which was a miracle in and of itself) and lived through a couple crazy early adult years, I came to appreciate my parents so much more. I actually liked spending time with them and couldn't get enough of their advice. I became so interested in who I was and where I came from. I wanted to know how my parents became who they are today. I would call my Dad at work and ask the most random questions about his past, his likes and dislikes, among other random stuff. I inquired and listened to my Mom's stories about growing up and what her life was like before she met my Dad. I began to see them as more then just parents, but as real people with real stories. I wanted to know EVERYTHING about everything because I didn't want the day to come where they were gone and I had questions that I couldn't get answered. I wanted to be able to pass their stories down so that my kids and grandkids could know these extraordinary people who raised me.

Now that I have my own children I understand why my parents were so hard on me. This world is a scary place and I want to protect and prepare my children as much as I can, just like my parents wanted to protect and prepare me. I understand the importance of instilling strong values and character. I know that being a parent means more then just being the person who physically takes care of their children, but rather never giving up, constantly working hard so that your children can be the best that they are capable of being and being there no matter what.

My parents gave me the greatest gift they could have ever given me by raising me in a Christian home and pushing me to constantly pursue a life with Christ. They taught me how to live, how to lead, how to love, how to handle crisis and so much more. I have the deepest appeciation and respect for both of my parents and I only hope to someday have their wisdom to pass on to my children. I am so incredibly blessed! I love my family from the depths of my heart and couldn't imagine a life without any of them. Our history is rich, our relationhips are strong and we represnt everything that a family can be.

Who do you come from? What have you learned from your family? What can you still learn from them? What can you do for them? How can you use your experiences and lessons from your family to help others? I challenge you to take a look at your family and dig deeper. Christ blesses beyond measure through our families!

And now we breathe ...

2010-07-09T11:29:00.002-06:00

"But as for me, I will sing about your power. I will shout with joy each morning because of your unfailing love. For you have been my refuge, a place of safety in the day of distress. O my strength, to you I sing praises, for you O God, are my refuge, the God who shows me unfailing love." - Psalm 59: 16-17

Where to begin ... At the end of February my husband was unfairly let go of his position at work. It was awful. He had been struggling with the working relationship between his boss and himself for a long time. She was a cruel woman who truly had it out for him. She finally set him up for failure and there was no way out of it. He was let go and denied unemployment benefits because of the situation. Can you imagine our worries as a family of five going into a period of unemployment with no income and no substantial savings to back us up? Yikes ...

Oddly enough, despite the situation, I didn't feel too terribly worried about how we would make ends meet. I had a strong sense of faith in my heart and felt that God would surely carry us through this time. At the beginning of the year we committed to start tithing every month for the year of 2010 ... no matter the circumstance we would give what we could. Before my husband even lost his job things started happening in our finances. Some of our monthly bills began drastically dropping in what we owed. It was almost as if these savings dropped into our laps as I hadn't gone looking for them. After my husband lost his job, these savings continued as little refunds and opportunities to earn extra money came up often. It was an amazing blessing! For the entire four months that he was unemployed we paid every single one of our bills on our own, on time (even early) and still ended up with extra money to treat our children and do fun things as a family. Such a blessing!

During this time we were also caught in an ugly battle with his former employer fighting to get our unemployment payments since they had been denied. This employer was ruthless, adamant and would stop at nothing to fight us. They went to the extreme of hiring a large firm to represent them, they fabricated evidence, etc. It was ugly to say the least. We were EXTREMELY blessed by the kindness of a friend of our families, an employment attorney, who took our case and fought for us. He spent hours upon hours of his time to help us asking nothing in return.

The emotional stress that this case caused was awful. My husband was sick to his stomach often and couldn't even talk about it. I prayed like I have never prayed before .. I got on my knees, begged, pleaded and even praised Him throughout the situation. I felt like David hiding out in the caves from my enemies, clinging to my Lord for protection and begging for justice. Then one day justice came. I opened the letter from the unemployment office and read the words "Claimant is found NOT AT FAULT and is awarded full benefits." !!! My heart felt like it could burst with joy and excitement. "The godly will rejoice when they see injustice avenged. They will wash their feet in the blood of the wicked. Then at last everyone will say, 'There truly is reward for those who live for God; surely there is a God who judges justly here on earth.' " - Psalm 58:10-11.

God is so good! The same week that we received the news about the unemployment (right as our money had run out), my husband interviewed for a job and was offered the job on the spot. This was also a job in a completely new field which uses his skills that he has recently acquired since joining the military. He was "tickled fancy" to say the least. He is making more money, doing what he loves and has a schedule that is convenient for our family allowing him to have even more time to spend with our daughters. Is God amazing or what?!

We have been blessed to say the least. We made a commitment to give to Him financially, which was a hard choice to make, but He took that small step and blessed us immensely. Thank you to our friends, family and church family who have continually lifted us up in prayer throughout this situation. To know that we had an army praying for us was incredible and we are so grateful! Thank you to our attorney for having faith in us, working with us, giving us your time and your efforts. Without you justice would NOT have been served. You have been covered in prayer by so many and I pray that now you are blessed ten fold for blessing our family. Lastly, praise be to GOD who carried us through. Words cannot express my love, my faith, my appreciation and my joy for you. Thank you for continuing to carry me when I couldn't face you, for never letting go, for protecting my family and for the awesome testimony you have provided. Yahweh Nissi you ARE my banner of strength!

I pray that as you all read this, you are encouraged in your own struggles ... when life is seemingly at wits end or if it seems like there is no hope trust in Him. There is always hope. Things might work out differently then you thought they needed to, but sometimes His plan is even better then we could have imagined. Even when your faith is rocked, keep trusting, it is then when you are humbly on your knees before Him that miracles begin to happen.

Jesus Loves The Little Children

2010-06-07T13:52:00.000-06:00

“But Jesus said, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children.” - Matthew 19:14

“ … and Lord, thank you for these beautiful girls that you blessed me with. Thank you so much for making me their Mommy.” This is how my prayers end each night when we do bedtime prayers with the girls. I often like to remind myself that these are not my children so to speak. They are His. He hand picked me to be their guardian. I am called to protect them, teach them, guide them and nurture them. It is my duty to lead them to Him. What an amazing job to be given … to be given these perfect little creatures and “grow them” for Him.

My youngest is just two and a half. In a logical sense she does not know Jesus. She doesn’t know the facts, she doesn’t understand the importance of having faith. But every night before bed, she says, “Dear God. Thank you, mommy, daddy, dister (sister), puppy (which we don’t have) … maymen (amen)!” She is always so eager to talk to God. She proudly says her prayers and then, usually, goes to bed happily. It makes me so happy to see her develop that step of faith at such a young age. Faith starts in small steps.

Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Children cling to everything that we, as parents, do or say. They are easily influenced and therefore are very trusting. Lead your precious child to Him. Take advantage of that short period of time when your children are young and open. Breathe Jesus into their everyday lives. As you do, watch them grow and develop deep and lasting relationships with Him. It is an awesome experience to witness! The greatest gift you can give your child is the gift of knowing Jesus.

A Friend Loves At All Times

2010-05-01T16:28:00.001-06:00

During the last year I have had the chance to really examine my friendships. Rather then going day to day living with my friends, I have taken the time to sit back and really look at my different friendships. Like anyone else my friendships have had their ups and downs. I've experienced the pure joy and bliss that friendship can bring and I have also witnessed the raging storms that sometimes creep into friendships. I have gained many precious friends over the years and sadly lost others along the way.

Friends are a precious commodity to me. I honestly don't know how I would live without mine. All of my friends are totally different and bring different things to my life. I value each and everyone of them for the various aspects that they contribute to my life. I can look back on various times in my life when I have felt a certain way, and remember needing or wanting a specific person who I knew could carry me through whatever that situation was. The friend that I could call on depended on what I was going through. God blesses us richly in that way. He gives us variety to spice up our lives. Wouldn't it be boring if we all only had one friend who was our only friend and that was all we got?! Even if that person held all the qualities we would ever need or desire in a friend, it would still get boring. He gives us the chance to build multiple friendships with a vast number of unique people.

As stated above I have had my share of ups and downs in friendships. Sadly some of those downs have been caused my by own selfish ambition and pride. I have hurt others and been hurt by others. I have turned my back, withdrawn my hand and even wimped out on some of my friends over the years. I am not proud of that. God has been working in me over the last year and showing me parts of myself that need fixin'! As important of a role as my friendships have played in my life, I have not always done my best to be thankful for and given my all to maintain some of those.

Proverbs 17:17 says, "A friend loves at all times ... " Have you always loved your friends as you should? Have your friends always been given a fair and honest part of you? Have you been loyal? We have all fallen short in friendships and relationships. It is only human to fail! I think though, that we need to step back and examine those times when we have failed our friends and take an honest look at ourselves. What kind of friend am I? What do I offer? How can I better serve my friends? The greatest example of a loyal friend is someone who sticks by you during the most difficult times of distress and personal struggle. It can be hard to be a friend to someone during times like that, but that is when you can be your best to those you love. That is when friendships really counts. Don't be remembered as the person who was around when it suited only themself and then disappeared when the going got tough. Be remembered as the dear friend who was always there, even when it was hard. The person who could always be counted on.

As I look forward to the future of my friendships I am seeking how I can be that better person. As much as these precious people mean to me, they deserve the best from me all the time. A friend loves at all times. It comes down to a simple logic, love. Nurture and care for those special people that you have been blessed with. They have been handpicked for you and you for them!

Holding On Strong Through The Storm

2010-04-20T14:36:00.001-06:00

Have you ever listened to the song, "Praise You In This Storm" by Casting Crowns? It is among my current favorites and moves me so strongly especially during this time of trial in my life.

"I was sure by now, God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away."

Right now, I am trying very hard to hold on to His promises and provisions. My husband lost his civilian job at the end of February and at first I never had a doubt in my mind that God would provide for us. I went into the situation confident of God's plan for us. I wasn't worried or fearful of our families fate in the least bit. Even though He has given us small financial blessings and given us the luxury of spending so much family time together (Senior Airman was deployed last year March-August for training and we didn't see him) I have found myself getting more worried and questioning when He will step in and save the day. I have faith that the perfect job is out there and the right opportunity will arise, but I think it is only human to become rundown and fearful.

"And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm"

I think the important thing to remember is that despite our present circumstances, He is with us. Even when we can barely hear His voice whispering through the rain, we should ground our fears and focus in on Him. I am trying to find that courage and hope that I had a couple months ago. I am pushing myself to praise Him even when I am discouraged and dismayed. When I do this, I feel His comfort and grace. The rain doesn't always stop but I know that He is there standing over me, sheltering me. Isaiah 55:8-9 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." It is comforting to remember that He sees things in a completely different way than we do. What is blurry and distorted to us, He sees clearly.

So I encourage you as you go through similar struggles to remember that He can see what we cannot. Remember all the times that He did come through for you, when He did provide for you and keep you from harms way. By looking back on those times when He came through for you, your faith will grow. Praise Him for everything He has done, for everything you have, for everything that HE is.

The Greatest Love Story

2010-04-01T14:48:00.000-06:00

I came across the following verse over the weekend and it really touched me and helped prepare my heart for Holy week ...

"But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners." Romans 5:8

The last part of the verse, while we were still sinners, was the part that really caught my attention and pulled me in. Jesus came after many, many generations of sinners had already walked the earth. This was already a fallen world. God, being the all knowing Father that He is, also knew that sin would continue to plague His people in future generations to come. He didn't send Jesus because we were good and we deserved it ... He sent Jesus despite our disobedience because He loved us so deeply.

To paint the picture more clearly and to help you understand this act of love imagine this ... Imagine that there is a parent with a very rebellious child. A child who deliberately disobeys his parent. A child who ignores, spreads lies about, and has completely rejected his parent. If you are a parent you can imagine how hurtful and heart breaking it would be to have your child treat you in such a way. It would be so painful to endure such rejection from your own child, or from anyone for that matter. In some cases it would be much easier to just walk away and I think in our world many people would go to the extreme of completely detaching themselves from a situation such as this just to escape the pain of the severed relationship.

Remember the words, while we were still sinners ... when we rejected God, when we choose worldly things over Him, when we refused to seek Him, when we turned our backs, when we ignored Him ... He still loved us. He is God, creator of the universe with the power to wipe us all out in the blink of an eye if He wanted to. When we rejected Him, He could have turned His back and left us for dead but He didn't. As much as His heart was breaking for us, He stuck around and not only did He stick around but He made the ultimate sacrifice so that we may have life through Him. That is powerful! Seriously people!!! I say this to you with urgency and might! Think about it ... Really stop and ponder this act of love. NO MATTER WHAT, He loves you.

As Easter quickly approaches take the time to think about this. Remember Christ's unconditional, irrevocable love and devotion to you. Remember the ultimate sacrifice that He made for you. If you were the only person on this entire earth who ever lived, He wouldn't have changed a thing ... He would have done it solely for you. He will always be there for you, waiting for you to knock, waiting for the chance to be a part of your life. No matter what you have done, no matter how much you have rejected Him or denied Him, He is still there. He already paid the price to give you life ... while you were still a sinner ... He loved you.

This Easter praise God for the gift of love and everlasting life that He has bestowed upon you ... Rejoice in His name and lift Him up and give thanks!!!

Psalm 104:33 I will sing to the Lord as long as I live. I will praise my God to my last breath!

Psalm 86:12 With all my heart I will praise you, O Lord my God. I will give glory to your name forever ...

Psalm 68:35 God is awesome in his sanctuary. The God of Israel gives power and strength to his people. Praise be to God!

Luke 1:68 “Praise the Lord, the God of Israel, because he has visited and redeemed his people."

Ephesians 1:3 All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ.

Oh Be Careful Little Mouth What You Say ...

2010-03-26T10:27:00.000-06:00

"So also, the tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do. A tiny spark can set a great forest on fire." James 3:5

I love my children ... I mean there are no words to express the love that I have for my children, they are precious to me. As parents, I think that we sometimes tend to over analyze our children - probably because we love them so much and want the absolute best for them and want to ensure that they are going forward in the right direction.

Being the sarcastic person that I am, I have been known to lovingly tease my girls. I don't ever talk badly about them or tear them down, that is a point I want to make clear, but sometimes Senior Airman and I will talk about them to each other or to other people in ways that don't exactly flatter them. For example, we have teased that our oldest will be the least likely to get into trouble in high school. She will be the smart, over achieving, people pleaser. Our youngest will be the wild one, the one that we will have to worry about rebelling. Lastly, that our middle child will be most likely to be the clueless blonde cheerleader type, beautiful but a little spacey. Ok, when I actually write it out, it seems worse then it did in my head ... hence the lesson that follows ...

For reasons that I won't get into, there is a reason we tagged our middle daughter that way. We love her dearly, but she does fit the genre of that stereotype. We have harmlessly teased about that since she was very little. It has always been in love, but I recently realized it was wrong of me. During my quiet time a few weeks ago God really laid this child on my heart. He deeply convicted me of this teasing. He showed me that she is a precious child of God and that He created her to be exactly what she is. He showed me that as her mother, I should always build her up and praise her for the wonderful qualities that she holds, rather then tease her (especially to other people) about something that she may never even become. I immediatley repented and promised to think twice about putting lables on any of my children in any sort of fashion.

That same night I went to my Led By The Spirit class and had a prophetic word spoken over me from someone who didn't know me or my children. God spoke to me again through this stranger and I was shocked at the message. He said that this child specifically, was extremley smart and that He wanted me to believe in that firmly. He said that we will have to fight for her academically as she might learn differently then other children, but not to forget that she is a very smart girl and so on and so forth. Wow ... I mean it was like God prepped me for that message by first showing me my sin in teasing and then by reinforcing qualitites she held that I suspected she might lack. He believed in her and I needed to see her in the same way. I just sat there and cried. I was so ashamed at myself.

Sometimes the most innocent words can hurt the most. My daughter is young enough that she will never remember us teasing her and labeling her in the way we did, but what if we had kept it up? What if she overheard us talking about her like that to other people? Would she feel encouraged by our words or embarassed? I find myself being much more sensitive to the words I use to descibe my children or even the way that I talk to them ... As a naturally sarcastic person it is a challenge for me. As Senior Airman likes to remind me, even though I am just kidding around other people might not see things the same way and get hurt or offended by my words. I challenge you to watch the words that you are speaking over your children. Be purposeful to uplift them, encourage them and empower them - even when you think they can't hear what you are saying. Our children thrive and cling to our every word so make sure you are using your words wisely.

Divine Expertise ... What's Yours?

2010-03-23T14:26:00.000-06:00

Have you ever felt useless? Maybe your life is completely fulfilling but you wish there was some way that you could make a more significant impact on the world around you ... I know that I have felt that way. In fact for the past couple of years I have struggled with finding my place in this world. I adore being a mother, wife, daughter and friend but I couldn't help feeling that I was called to higher purpose ... that I could serve God and be a part of the bigger picture.

I searched for a ministry to get involved with in my church, but nothing really stood out to me. I started a class that encouraged the discovery of personal spiritual gifts. I had read about spiritual gifts in the bible and knew that everyone was supposed to have them, but hadn't really studied it much further. After taking a gift assessment I was not surprised to find that my spiritual gift was that of exhortation (encouragement). I have always been an optimist and seem to be one that others come to for advice and encouragement. I decided to start practicing using my gift through writing (another area of my life that I have felt led to pursue). I can tell you that, when you can combine your God given gifts with something that you are already passionate about, sparks fly! Although I am new at this, I feel God pulling me in and showing me how to use these giftings to minster to others.

What excites me about this is that we don't have to search for a spiritual gift that fits us, because in fact we are born with them! God has placed several gifts on each of us and we are called to use those gifts to further His ministry. Roman 12:6-8 says, "In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly."

Don't be discouraged in thinking that you don't have what it takes to use your specified gift ... the good news is that we already have in us everything we need to put those giftings to work! You will soon find that your divine gifting is your expertise! I encourage you to uncover your spiritual gifts and then ask God to develop those in you further and show you where you can use them. Doors of opportunity will open up for you and lead you to ultimate fulfilment in serving Him. It is exciting and honoring to see what God has given us and we can use those to minister to others. Speaking from my own experience, after discovering what He has given me and pursing that gift for His glory, I feel inspired, driven and excited to go forward.

The Life that Lasts

2010-03-21T15:00:00.000-06:00

My very first attempt at simple exegeis and personal application:

1 Peter 1:13 "So think clearly and exercise self control. Look forward to the special blessings that will come to you at the return of Jesus Christ."

1 Peter was written sometime around the time of 62-64 A.D. probably in Rome. 1st century Christians were being persecuted for believing in and obeying Jesus. It was during the time of the great persecution under the Roman Emperor Nero (Peter was eventually killed during the great persecution). Christians suffered in numerous ways including but not limited to physical abuse, debilitating diseases, social ostracism, persecution and even death. Sufferings, then and today, tempt people to give up and take the easy way out. Peter had encountered a tremendous amount of persecution and suffering himself and the purpose of this letter was to encourage and give hope to other Christians in hopes that they would not give up but stay strong and hold true to Jesus Christ. He wrote the letter to Jewish Christians who were driven out of Jerusalem and scattered across Asia Minor and to Christians everywhere.

Peter is concluding a theme on salvation in verse 13 and he uses words that create powerful imagery in order to appeal to his readers. The verbs think, exercise and look give strong suggestions on how we should act or what we should do in order to be closer to Jesus Christ. He advises that we should think clearly (be mentally alert, judge, regard, use or exercise our minds in order to make decisions) and exercise (discipline, exert, systematically train by multiple repetitions, “practice makes perfect”) self control (which means to control our impulses, self discipline, practice will power and restraint). Then we should look forward (perceive with attention, direct our gaze or expect) to the special blessings that will be bestowed upon us when Christ returns. These words in association with the theme of salvation through Christ are used to suggest a call to holy living.

Literally, Peter is finishing explaining the glories of what is to come. He gives Christians a few requirements of holy living and he paints a picture of what is waiting for us in the days ahead and what blessings salvation will bring. He points out that although there will be suffering and persecution we should be assured that grace is upon us. When we practice self control and put our focus clearly on Christ we will be rewarded. “Our lives are to be controlled by our focus on the ever present reality of Christ’s return and the glory that comes with that” (Dwight Edwards).

It is so easy to get caught up in our everyday lives and lose our focus on Christ. When we are tired, weak or feeling hopeless it is easy to become frustrated with God and look for worldly ways to ease our sorrows. It is easy to rely on ourselves or on worldly things instead of Him in these situations. Peter calls us to live holier and rise above this. He encourages us to not only live in the here and now but also in the future; to look forward to the rest, grace and blessings that Christ has waiting for us. Nowhere in the bible does it say that living a Christian life is easy … in fact it is clearly points out that we will face trials and sufferings in our Christian walk. Peter is trying to encourage us to trudge through those sufferings and he gives us guidelines on how to do so. He says that we should think clearly and exercise our self control. That means we should judge our thoughts, use regard and practice restraining ourselves from sin. He goes further to say that as we do those things we should look forward and expect what special blessings that Christ has waiting for us. So, keep your minds on Christ and mediate on things to come instead of worrying about today. Romans 8:6 similarly focuses on this theme, “For to be fleshly minded is death but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.”

When I am tired and my faith is being tested I will change my focus from death to the blessings and life that Christ offers me. I will meditate on His words, promises and give thanks for the blessings He has bestowed on me. By doing this and changing my thought process I will be exercising my self control. When I practice self control I allow myself to be closer with Christ and live in accordance with His will for my life and reward is sure to follow.

Let Go & Let God

2010-02-24T12:37:00.000-07:00

Sometimes my life baffles me ... I think, "how did I get here?", "why am I am in these situations?" or, "I just don't get it God." Sometimes I look into the mirror and wonder when I became who I am today. Don't get me wrong, my life is full of love, joy and happiness. I have a beautiful family and the best friendships that anyone could ever ask for. But, Senior Airman and I have been through our share of struggles and sometimes I wonder when the cycle will ever break. When will we reach that point of achievement that we are striving for? Have you ever felt that way?

I am a firm believer that God is in control and that He has His own special plans for my life that I may know nothing about. When I am wanting my life to go in one direction He might be pushing me into something in the complete opposite direction. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." I take that to heart and firmly believe in those words, but I also wonder ... "what are those plans God?! Hello! Anytime you want to fill me in would be great!"

I am a strong woman and I like to be in control of the things in my life. I like to tackle problems myself and come up with my own solutions. If I can't come up with a good enough solution I don't ever hesitate to go to others (keyword: others, not Him) for advice. This is my downfall ... I am learning that I need to let go of my control and let God take control. 'Soul control' as I like to call it ... yikes ... that is a tough one. Life would be so much easier if we could all let go and let our spirits lead us, but we are after all human and being spirit led can be a struggle.

My verse of the month is Hebrews 13:5, "... I will never fail you. I will never abandon you." Wow! I mean there is not really a lot to say to follow that verse, it is simplistic and powerful. The LORD has been drilling that into my mind lately. He reminds me of it daily through other peoples words, through dreams and then he plainly throws it into my everyday thought processes. He WILL NOT fail me and He WILL NOT abandon me. That right there people is love. I don't deserve His love and I especially don't deserve His unending promises of hope and security yet He still gives it to me freely. When you really stop and digest those words and think about what they mean, it is powerful stuff.

What does this all mean and why do these verses have significance to my questions and doubts about my life ... what it comes down to is remembering that I have a God who deeply loves me, who wants the best for me, who gives me the tools I need to be the biggest success that I am capable of being, who is not only walking next to me as I go through life but completely covering me. So, when I go through times like I am right now, I read these verses along with others and meditate on them and their meanings. I ask Him to speak to me and I will myself to listen to the answers and follow where He calls me. Even when I don't get the answers I am seeking, the giants seem much smaller and I can feel a quiet confidence rise up inside me. It all comes down to faith in Him and trusting in His plans. The greatest part of this is that this isn’t just my story … every one of you listening is part of a master plan of promise and hope. You all have his love and devotion, His covering of protection and His light leading you down your path. So when life throws you into a chaotic whirlwind, take heart that you are not alone … you have the tools and abilities to persevere through. He won’t leave you or forsake you. How lucky we are to have such an adoring God! I genuinely am sad for those who don't have Him in their life ... I would be at a complete loss without the guidance and promises of my LORD, and that comes straight from the mouth of a control freak.

Merry Christmas

2009-12-28T14:43:00.000-07:00

This year Senior Airman and I decided to do something different for our families for Christmas. We took ideas from a few different sources, worked together and came up with a great gift!

We spent time focusing on each family member and wrote a piece on each one of them. After a lot of prayer and consideration we focused in and wrote about their strengths, special giftings, unique characteristics, what they mean to us, etc. It was a piece that was meant to edify, encourage and comfort each individual.

We then ended each piece with, "If we could give you any gift in the whole world we would give you ... " We focused on various needs or desires of each person - all non-material. We then went through magazines and cut out words or sayings that we believed fit each person. Then, on Christmas we presented each person with their special gift.

It was fun to take on the project together as a team and it really helped us focus on more than just material gifts this year. We were able to focus on each family member and look fondly on who they are and what they mean to us.

The Strongest Power

2009-11-06T10:45:00.000-07:00

Psalm 56:7-11 "Don't let them get away with their wickedness; in your anger, God, throw them to the ground. You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. On the very day I call to you for help, my enemies will retreat. This I know: God is on my side. O God, I praise your word. Yes Lord I praise your word. I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? What can mere mortals do to me?”

Oh how scary and painful this world can be ... I've been through some hurtful situations in my life. Some things that I thought I would never get past and that in fact I still struggle with at times today. I have had a broken heart and felt physically broken from that. I've encountered death, loss and crushed dreams. I have felt betrayed, used, left out and useless. Life can be cruel.

Going through hardships myself is hard enough but to see someone that I love go through them and be completely broken because of it - it rips through me. I am very possessive of my family and my friends ... When someone I care about is wronged something stirs up in me from the pit of my stomach. From the time that I was a child, seeing my parents go through trials and losses, seeing my little sister get picked on by friends, witnessing my friends get trampled on ... it has all weighed heavily on my heart. I feel deeply and love deeply.

Sometimes I wish I could be bigger than what I am so that I could bring justice and resolve to all the hardships my loved ones face. I wish I was a giant with supernatural intelligence so that I could hunt down my enemies and crush them in the way that would hurt them the most. But I am no giant ... I don't have supernatural intelligence. I am only me. Where I find my comfort and strength is through Him. He is bigger than a giant. He can crush my enemies. My enemies cannot hide from Him. They cannot shield their thoughts and fears from Him. He sees through their lies. He brings justice, resolve, healing and strength. He loves deeply and He works mightily.

My family and friends who face these struggles and these hurts ... I cannot crush your enemy as I so desire to. I cannot hunt down your foe. But I can offer my prayers. My prayers are powerful for they go to the most powerful. They go to He who loves you and who wants you to rest peacefully. They go to Him WHO WILL PREVAIL. If He is for us, who can be against us? He is bigger than me, bigger than you, bigger than our enemies, bigger than our circumstances, bigger than our hurts and bigger than our broken hearts. I wish I could wrap you up in my arms and shield you from the struggles that you face ... let Him wrap you up. Let Him guide you to peace and rest. Let Him love you. I love you.

Making Right

2009-10-15T09:33:00.000-06:00

Has there ever been a situation, or two, in your life in which your circumstances built up and up and before you knew it they became a mountain? Sometimes you may look back and wonder how things became so messy and complicated ... and perhaps selfishness or pride keeps you from fixing what you really feel like you need to fix ... ugh ... I am there in a couple of areas in me life. Let me tell you it is hard.

My relationship with Christ has improved so much in the year and I have been so blessed by the mighty things He is doing in my life. He has opened doors, taught me how to listen better and has blessed my family in numerous ways ... I should have known He would also drudge up some things that I needed to deal with that I had sort of put away in a closet. It is awesome when He does amazing works in our lives, but be advised that He also wants to help us deal with the dark areas in our lives where we have sinned or with situations that we have kept Him out of - whether we want to deal with those or not.

Philippians 2:1-4
"... Are your hearts tender and sympathetic? Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one heart and one purpose. Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better then yourself. Don't think only about your affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing."

My recent struggles have been in various relationships in my life. I have had a couple situations in that I let dwindle, even stoked in the fire a little when I shouldn't have and most of all I am sure people have been hurt because of it. I am not perfect and I am the first to admit to that. Like I said before, I have selfishly and pridefully kept myself from fixing these situations. Oh man, it is hard. Some of these situations involved other people who had hurt me as well, knowingly and unknowingly ... it is hard to let go of those things. Even as I write this I am still unsure of how to go about repairing these trying situations and am not even sure if I want to. The fact that it lays so heavy on my heart tells me that HE wants me to take care of it.

Luke 17:4
"Even if that person wrongs you seven times a day and each time turns again and asks forgiveness, you must forgive.”

I encourage you as you face similar situations in your life to turns these over to Christ. Even when it is hard. If you feel that tugging on your heart leading you resolve past or present issues in your life, listen to it! Most of the time when the Holy Spirit speaks to you He is telling you to do something that you are not comfortable with and that challenges you. I'm sure it is such a freeing feeling when you can resolve that problem and let it go ... I'm not just trying to encourage you - I am talking myself into this as I write as I know it is the right thing to do. So as I take this challenge and try to mend my issues, hand them over to God, learn to forgive and get over myself, I challenge you to do the same if you have a struggle that you have been storing away in the closet.

I don't have a formula to give you on how to resolve your issue, all I can offer is the advice that you just need to hand it over Him and constantly pray over it. BE OPEN to resolution and don't talk yourself out of something that He is calling you to do. When God wants something done He will get it done with or without your help, so make the choice to be the tool that He uses to do it ... Peace!!!

Praise Him In YOUR Storm

2009-10-01T14:57:00.000-06:00

In my quiet time today I was led to read my “Trusting In The Names Of God” book by Catherine Martin. The book talks about all the different names of God and what they mean, how to use them, etc. I turned to the chapter on Trusting in Yahweh Nissi – He is your Victory. It spoke to me and a dozen of you came to mind. I felt called to speak this message, if you will, to you. I thought I would highlight some of what the chapter talks about and hope that I don’t bore you but instead inspire you to know that despite your present circumstances Yahweh Nissi (God) is on your side fighting your battles and if you let Him, He will bring you victory!

“What does knowing Yahweh Nissi tell you about yourself? You need someone to fight for you and bring victory in your life. The Lord is the one who fights for you. Run to Yahweh Nissi when you need victory in the battle you face today. What will the banner of the Lord look like in your life? Some scholars suggest that Moses’ upraised hands represented prayers and petitions and intercession on behalf of the people of God in the heat of the battle.

What banner do you hold in your life? Is Yahweh Nissi your banner? Or do you carry the banner of self, believing you are the only one to fight the battle? Or do you carry the banner of money, believing if only could be a millionaire, you could win your war? Or is the banner of position your reliance, believing if only you could have the perfect job, your problem, whatever it may be, will be solved?

When you are in the heat of the battle, think of Moses and the staff in his hand. When he had the staff high (trusting and following God’s commands) in his hands, Israel won, and when it fell, they began to lose. And so it is with you – defeat is sure if you hold up any banner but Yahweh Nissi. Victory is certain if you hold high your banner, Yahweh Nissi. Look to the Lord to fight your battles. Cry out to Him. The Lord will give you wisdom every step of the way as He leads you.

Pray in the heat of the battle and watch the Lord win the battle – He is victor! Oh, how exciting to watch Yahweh Nissi gain the victory in a life, whether that life is your life, a family member’s or a friend’s. Joy is your great response in praising Yahweh Nissi. Nehemiah taught the people of God, ‘The joy of the Lord is your strength!’ How can you rejoice in Him today? ‘Great are the works of the Lord; they are studied by all who delight in them. Splendid and majestic is His work and His righteousness endures forever!’ Psalm 11:2-3”

Last words – from ME!
Times are tough for everyone right now. We are all facing different battles today, this week, this month and this year. I feel pledged to tell you that you are not alone! Ask Him to help you, stay in His presence, petition your needs to Him, and intercede for those around you who are struggling … He will answer. Our God is not a God who neglects or turns His back. He LOVES us and He wants us to succeed and prosper. He does not desire to see you bound to the ground in hopelessness and despair. He desires you to stay with Him and trust Him. If you let Him, He will bring you out of your battle as the winner!!! And most importantly, it is so easy for us to come to God with our problems and plead for help (he wants us to!) but even in the midst of our battles we need to praise Him! Like the last couple of sentences above we must have joy in the Lord as that is our strength! I encourage you read the words of the song, ‘Praise You In This Storm’ by Casting Crowns.

I encourage you friends and family who are struggling to turn to Him, don’t turn away, place yourself closer then ever before and He will show you a victory in your battle. You, my friend, cannot win it yourself, you are simply incapable, but with Him you can do anything! I will remember you and your situation in my prayers this week …

Love,
Sarah

Mon meilleur ami

2009-09-28T17:19:00.001-06:00

I have a friend, a very special friend. She has been around for what seems like forever. We met as immature pre-teens. We sang "My favorite Things" on the tops of our lungs together, played practical jokes on each other, laughed for hours together, we went through the transition of stretch pants to jeans together, and had really poofy bangs like each other ... We were teenagers together. We gushed over first dates, went through high school together, spent endless weekend nights running through grave yards with our friends playing games, went to youth group together, went on retreats together, we graduated together, we toured Europe together, we helped each other through broken hearts and we laughed a lot too ... We became adults together. We laughed even more, we cried even more, we faced "real life" and it was scary sometimes, we went through pregnancies together, we discovered "The Rio" together, we became wine drinkers, we helped each other through up hill battles, we were there for each other when there was no one else. We have been through it all ...

This girl is so great ... I just love her to death! I could not imagine my life without her in it. She has helped me face giants in my life, listened to me complain, listened to me cry, listened to me rant and rave about things that were totally irrelovent and yet she never made me feel like they were. She picked me up when I was down, never left my side when I needed a friend and she shared in all my joy as well.

This girl has had her share of struggles as well. She has been broken hearted and run down. She has cried until there was nothing left to cry. She had the imense strength to take on motherhood as a single mommy ... and she never complained about it. Regardless of her struggles she could switch on a smile and light up a room and bring everyones to their knees laughing.

She is a special girl ... she is a very patient girl. Knowing exactly what she wanted in life, she held on to what she had and kept going forward even when going forward was the hardest thing to do. More then anyone she deserved a happy ending ... and then one day it came ... her prince, her knight on the white horse arrived and swept her off her feet (literally). Wow ... I can't even begin to express my excitment, my joy, my pure happiness for her. I smile just to think of it! This is her time to shine. My friend, my very best friend who has shared in every part of my life is getting married ... I could not be more thrilled and my heart could not be more happy. I am so blessed to have such a beautiful friend in my life and I love her dearly. Best wishes to you friend as you venture on this journey. I am anxious to see where the road of life takes you and your family ...

Ladies, it has been fun ...

2009-08-08T13:42:00.000-06:00

Well ladies, it has been fun ... at times it has also been tiring, frustrating, lonely, scary and for those reasons and so many more I am so blessed to have such a strong group of girlfriends to help me through the rough times! Where would I have been without you?

One afternoon in April I collapsed on my bed after a really long, hard week and I pushed back tears, swallowed my disappointment and frustrations ... you see this was the day that I had been looking forward to for weeks ... The first night that I would get to actually go out with my friends since Josh had been gone. The plans got cancelled due to one of those random spring time blizzards - of all days! Not only had I had an extremely hard week (and day!) my one chance of getting a little bit of freedom was gone. The next thing I knew my phone rang and the dearest of all my friends said, "get dressed I am on my way to come get you - you need this and I'm not taking no for an answer!" She drove through the elements of the storm and picked me up along with two other of our friends and safely got us to our destination. Meanwhile another great friend, my next door neighbor, volunteered to come sit at my house for three hours and stay with my daughters so that I could go ... how amazing is this group of ladies?!

There was also this middle of the night frantic phone call that I made to my fearless storm defying friend. It was late, I had a nightmare and was scared out of my mind ... it was two days after Josh had left and I woke up and just cried. She did not hesitate to take my call, comfort me and sit on the phone with me until I felt better.

One of my next door neighbors, the amazing woman who offered to watch my children more then I could ever repay, also mowed my lawn for me. Who knew that a woman could mow the lawn?! I had never done it, had no desire to do it and was very thankful for a friend who would offer to do such a thing - AND to do it on her days off from working a full time job and taking care of her own family! Wow, what a blessing you were! I actually have since learned to mow the lawn and now know that, duh(!) of course a woman can mow the lawn! Although I will be glad to hand that job back over to the husband when he returns home.

There were also the dinners ... so many wonderful dinners! I had several friends and neighbors invite me and the little ones over for meals. It was such a nice escape from sitting at the "kid table" every night without any adult conversation. One incredible friend in particular called me at least every weekend and several times throughout the week to make plans to dine with her, her husband and her family. Thank you friend, for making me feel a part of your family and for letting us step in and join in on your family time, it meant so much ... thank you to all for those dinners!

Lastly there is our families ... I cannot even begin to thank you for the endless babysitting so that I could take time out for me, the never ceasing to stop phone calls that were for nothing more then for me to hear another adult voice, inviting me over for get togethers, helping with tedious work around my house and always being there for every little need that came my way. What would we do with out you? I am ever so grateful!

There were many phone calls, long conversations over bottles of wine, play dates, babysitting, help with my housework, carpools, midnight trips to Walmart to stand in line for Twilight, ladies there to listen to me whine and complain about the struggles of being a single mother of three, and so much more ... I have been ever so blessed by my friends, neighbors and family ... When a situation comes into your life where you are alone, out of your element and a temporarily different person, you learn who your real friends are ... the ones who stick by you, take you under their wing and help carry you until you are able to get back on your feet. Thank you, thank you, thank you ladies ... it has been a fun adventure and I'm glad to have had you by my side as I journeyed it ... but now I'm thrilled to announce that my baby's comin' home!

Letting Go ...

2009-08-07T09:41:00.000-06:00

Today was my eldest daughters first day of kindergarten ... How did we arrive here already?! It seems like just yesterday I was running up the street to my bus stop and waiting for the bus to take me to my first day of kindergarten. I remember it so well. I had curls in my long, brown hair. I wore a matching shirt/skirt magenta outfit with black polka dots all over it ... It was sort of ruffly ... totally 80's! I still have the pictures of my sister and best friend and I standing up at the bus stop. Was that really twenty two years ago? I remember practicing spelling my last name in the car on the way to school one morning and my Mom not letting me out of the car until I had it right H-A-R-M-O-N-Y. Learning to spell the word dinosaur was a part of my kindergarten experience - something that once I learned I felt extremely big kid-ish and important knowing. A few of my memories include watching eggs hatch into baby chicks, sitting through circle time giggling with my friends, crushing on boys, learning that not everybody had the same beliefs as I did and being stunned that they didn't, learning school yard games such as: Monday marriage day, Wednesday wedding day and Friday flip up day - yeah all of us girls always wore skirts or dresses on Friday's. :) Oh the joys of elementry school!

Now my little one is off at school probably starting to gather up her own experiences. I wonder what kinds of stories she will come home to tell me ... What kinds of friends she will make ... What her learning style will be ... who knows?! I have mothered her and nurtured her as best as I could at home for the past five years and now it is time to hand her off to the teachers. So many things raced through my head last night as I mentally prepared myself for this day. Of course I was mostly excited for all that she would start to experience but there are also fears associated with handing your child over to the world. I don't want her to get her feelings hurt, her heart broken, pushed by a bully, teased by other children or get lost ... Some of that I just need to bit my lip and let happen, after all, we all have faced those issues at some point or another in our childhood and it helps shape and strengthen us. I concluded that all I can do is offer up prayers for her every morning and every night ... be there for her at the end of everyday with arms wide open ... continue to set a good example at home ... and to have faith that I've done my best to prepare her so that she will grow up to make the wisest choices.

Kindergarten is such a huge step in growing up ... I will always treasure the memories of today and look forward to hearing her side of the story twenty two years down the road when she sends her child off for their first day ...

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder ...

2009-08-04T14:21:00.001-06:00

So do you remember when you first started dating your 'love'? You just couldn't get enough of each other, right?! Talking on the phone for hours and never running out of things to say ... getting yourself all prettied up to go out on dates ... gushing to your friends about how great your guy is ... patiently (or impatiently in my case) waiting through seemingly never ending days until until you could reunite with this person ...Whether you went through this forty years ago, fifteen years ago or two years ago, we have all been through it or will go through it at some point in our romantic lives ... but then we get married and slowly things change. I'm not saying things change for the worse but that passion tends to decrease a little as time goes on. The endless "i love you" at the end of a phone call turns into a quick, "love ya!" The date nights sometimes fail to come up as often as they used to. We get comfortable, which can be ok ...

I have been lucky to have been through a brief separation from my husband. Lucky, you ask?! Let me assure you this was not a separation of the relationship just a physical separation as Senior Airman trained in the Air Force. During the past five months we have constantly been telling each other what a blessing it has been to be apart as we have "re-learned" how to bring the eagerness for one another back into our relationship. Before he left we seldom fought, and were very comfortable in our crazy life of parenting three little girls and running back and forth between all the activities in our life. We were happy but life was settled and in a routine ...

I would say after Senior Airman had been gone for a week all of a sudden I realized that I cannot live without him! I mean taking care of the girls was fairly easy, frustrating and tiring at times but there was no problem there, I could handle it ... but living without my best friend was unbearable. I went through a range of emotions associated with missing him. He wasn't just gone, he was out of contact. No phone calls except one ten minute call a week, no emails, no texts, nothing except old fashioned letters written with a pen and paper and mailed with a stamp ... I am such a romantic, I love letters, flowers, dates, the works - Senior Airman is not a romantic bottom line. I wrote him everyday he was in boot camp - EVERY day! All of a sudden a week after he left I started receiving those things called letters back ... not just letters, LOVE letters. Wow, I wasn't aware he had it in him! The things that came out of the man's mouth (or what he wrote on paper I should say) were brilliant! I was almost a little shy when I read them. I am certain I blushed more then once. I now have them neatly kept in a special place where I will forever keep and treasure them. Oddly enough, our time apart was really starting to seem like it was strengthining our relationship and helping us to appreciate each other and all we were so much more.

After boot camp was over, I got phone calls everyday and it was like we were dating all over again. I waited all day to get those calls and then we would talk for hours. Each call began with, "hello my beautiful wife!", which was out of norm by far. He still wrote me letters and some emails too. Then one day he got all quiet and told me that he had been thinking long and hard and he really wanted us to renew our vows ... he wanted our friends, families and everyone there. He wanted to tell the world how much he treasured me and was wildly in love with me. I was stunned ... typically it is the wife who suggests this and it comes around ten or twenty five years of marriage. We are only coming up on year six and HE suggested it - not only a mere suggestion mind you, this was a full fledged plea! I knew he was serious when a couple weeks later he asked again. I was so giddy I felt like he was asking me for the first time again!!! Apparently Senior Airman had been seeing me and our marriage in a whole new light just as I had been. We were falling in love all over again ...

Next week he comes home and I am beyond excited! I feel like I just went through the whole dating thing again. My heart has beat extra hard, my love has grown even deeper and now he gets to come home to me! I am blissfully excited and honestly don't feel like I am welcoming home my husband ... I feel like I am a newly wed about to begin life with the one I love.

I'm not sure that the vow renewal will happen this year, though he is pressing hard but I do know that public formality or not our vows are newly renewed in our hearts and our marriage has grown in leaps and bounds over the past five months. If I had the choice to do it all over again and face life alone for five months I would jump at the chance! The old adage "absence makes the heart grow fonder" rings true ... better then true ... life changing ... marriage changing ...

Maybe you should think twice before you come knocking on my door for the next few weeks ... I am after all in newly wed mode! Just kidding ... well maybe not ... :)

The Waiting Game

2009-07-22T08:53:00.000-06:00

Patience: an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay. If you know me, you know that I am very impatient ... seriously impatient. I would pray for patience although I heard the story about a woman who prayed for patience and got pregnant with twins ... I think not! Patience can be a tricky thing. When I want something, I want it now. I don't want to wait, take my time or think through it ... I just want it plain and simple. This is one of my pitfalls in life.

A few months ago some prophetic words were spoken over me that were truly incredible and very unexpected. A lot was said but in a nutshell God painted this picture of great changes in my life, full satisfaction, new locations, maturity in my giftings, and a new ministry that would be placed on me. WOW!!! As you can imagine, I was very excited to hear this. Now, my life is already fulfilling and I love it ... I am incredibly busy taking care of my children full time and all that comes with the job. Truthfully, sometimes I feel like there should be more ... I feel like I am missing out on what God has truly intended me to do, or my 'calling' in life. So since I heard the prophetic words I have been dwelling over them. I've been praying constantly over what I heard asking Him to reveal this plan and purpose to me. I trust that everything will happen in due time, but again, this patience thing is not my game!

I am ready for new opportunities, new people, new locations. I am ready to make some big changes, take an entire new direction in my life and set out on this adventure that He has in store for my family and I. But, how do you do that when that road is unclear? I really want to know! I am at a road block here. I guess what I will do is wait here with my suitcase and keep praying. One of these days that bus is going to stop here and take me to this place in life, the place I so desire ... I guess maybe God is trying to teach me patience in the meantime. Sometimes lessons are hard, and waiting on God's will is even harder ... but it will all be worth it in the end, right?! I will let you know when I get there :)

Bye Bye Baby

2009-07-06T13:00:00.000-06:00

I spent this last weekend redecorating my youngest daughters room. She is only a year and a half but I was ready to move her into a 'big girl' bed. She is my third and it feels like I have been in baby mode for the past five years ... strollers, cribs, diapers, high chairs ... some people could continue with the 'baby mode' for their whole lives but not me. I am ready for the adventures of childhood when my children take their wings and start to fly.

I am excited to watch and see where their little personalities take them. Will they be sporty girls who thrive on soccer and basketball or will they dance their hearts away as ballerina's? Will they like to be outdoors and play detective around the neighborhood like I did with my childhood friends? Oh the endless opportunities they have at this young and impressionable age! To be five years old again ... and have your whole life ahead of you - not that I still don't now but there is a certain magic about life when you are that age.

I used to think that my imagination would never go away when I grew up. I thought to myself, "I have an extra special creative imagination and I will always have it! I will always know how to play school with my stuffed animals and create adventurous games with my friends. I am me!" Well 'me' did grow up and I now marvel at my daughters imaginations and wonder where mine went ... my imagination now consists of fun vacations I would like to take, new ways to make extra money, how to create more space in the small rooms in my house - not the fun stuff of five year old me.

Sleep overs, girl scouts, neighborhood night games, hiking trips, road trips, Little House on the Prairie books, Berenstein Bear books (not the Sprout t.v. show), front porches that could transform into anything, winters when it seemed like it actually really did snow all time ... the little things of childhood that create the best memories. I cherish those precious times in my life and I can't wait for my children to experience that extra special time in life ... when the memories that you will always remember really start.

I loved having my babies and rocking their tiny little selves in my arms. They were precious and sweet and I will always treasure those times - but I am ready for the baby part to be done now. I will always love holding my friends new little ones but will be glad to go home to my big kids as they continue to grow up. Moving my 'baby' into her big girl bed is the beginning of childhood at play in the finest of years. It was a big step for us to put away the crib, rocking chair and baby blankets but we are ready for the road ahead of us. Let the imagination years begin full throttle! We're ready for some big adventures!!!

And So It Has Begun

2009-06-09T18:32:00.000-06:00

I love to write ... love it, love it, love it! I may not be a brilliant writer but I love to express myself through words. Now, what better way to do this than to start blogging?! My life may seem monotonous, routine and dull to some ... but truly, the life of a stay at home mother of three is anything but those things.

Thirteen months ago my husband of five and a half years decided that he was tired of working behind a computer desk. He was ready to take his life by the reigns and do something new, exciting and more fulfilling ... I was so excited for him! I always knew he was capable of amazing things if he just put his mind to it. You can imagine my surprise when he announced that his new plan was to follow his long abandoned dream of joining the military ... yeah not exactly what I had in mind. Never the less, I trust my husband and if this was something that he could find career and personal fulfillment in, I would back him up 100%.

Two months later he joined the Colorado Air National Guard in the Security Forces division. Nine months later he left for BMT (basic military training) and Security Forces Tech School at Lackland AFB in Texas. Senior Airman left for training and I stayed home to take care of our three daughters. He left in March and won't be home until mid-August. Everyone for the past year has gasped when we told them our plans. It was as if we were doing the unthinkable! We have experienced everything from criticism to praise, although mostly awe that we could endure these circumstances as a family. I never questioned our decision. I never once have resented him for putting me through a time of being a single mother of three- after all this will only be one of many times in our life that we will have to go through separations.

Since Senior Airman has left we have all bonded even closer then when we were at home together. The girls appreciate what it means to have a daddy so much more. I appreciate Senior Airman for everything that he is and stands for more then I ever did before. I am so proud of his decision to follow his own dreams regardless of what other people around him have said, for having the courage to enlist in such a critically important job and lastly for always putting our family first and being willing to make personal sacrafices in the process.

Life is sometimes hard being on my own with three kids running around. The girls' emotions are running on high as they are going through this adjustment time as are mine. I yearn for some peace and quiet which never seems to come. We have become accustomed to eating out much more and the evidence is there if you know what I mean! People are always asking how I do it, and I just smile to myself basking in my own glory for just a second. I just do it. You sometimes have to dig deep into yourself, deeper then you thought imaginable, and pull out your best. I have found strength inside of me that I never knew that I had, and it feels exceptionally good to know that I can do this. I have done it for the last three months, I can do it tomorrow and I can do it again when duty calls down the road. Five and a half years ago I said, "I do" and I will not back down on that comittment. No matter what struggles may come I am here with my feet firmly planted in the ground. I love my life, my family and I am especially crazy about my Airman husband. In some respects life is just beginning for us and I'm thrilled to get on this new roller coaster and see where it takes us!